Progress pic, some goals and a pumpkin pie

OK, I know. You can't really SEE much of what's going on under all of my layers here, dontchya love layers :) But for me this is progress. If you look at the detail, I'm wearing a skirt, Yay! And said skirt is technically above the knee, double Yay! This is progress, people, outfits are getting more colorful, the smile is getting wider and that's how things are getting measured around here these days.

So the whole not having a job thing kinda sucks. I seem to be over my curl up on the couch and block out the sun phase and have moved on to..... hmmmmm now what? Last year I gave up my career as a cardiac nurse to pursue some stress free happiness, the art school job came along and was a perfect fit, I stopped searching aimlessly, and settled into a sort of routine. I felt like I had got somewhere, made some progress, but now it doesn't really feel like that because here I am back at square one.

I'm taking this as a hippy dippy sign from the universe that I wasn't quite on the right path, that I needed to have a little wander along to see if I was headed in the right direction, and while it was nice and sunny, it was not leading me to where I am destined to go, wherever that is!

No doubt something will happen, it always does. Meanwhile I thought I'd just focus a bit more on healthy living while I wait for that gold nugget to drop out of the sky and into my bank account.

The gorgeous Hanlie who is always such an inspiration, is extra so this month. Embarking on a month of raw foods, Hanlie's green smoothies and sprouting bonanzas have got me thinking more and more about about my diet, and I've decided it's time to cut the crap and ditch the sweeties.

I work really well with goals, but I also don't work too well with total restriction, so I've set myself some goals this week, that aren't too obsessive, have some planned exceptions but are still a challenge. In case you were wondering, here they are:

• No processed sugar (except for two slices of pumpkin pie today, as part of the best pumpkin pie in the world competition, more on that later)
• No processed foods (except for one bowl of ramen noodles)
  
• Exercise daily
• One Yoga class

So there you have it. I've been working on the no sugar, no processed foods, exercise daily goals for a while now, years in fact, and it feels good to be working on them all at the same time. For me I think it's important to keep in mind my long term food/life/fitness goals and keep chipping away at them consistently. I may not be a clean eating, yoga doing, muscle bearing machine as yet, but I'm taking steps towards the idea, and that is a start.

The Pumpkin Pie thing is a long story, one I plan to elaborate on further over at NinjaEats, but I'll tell you this, my dear friend Chicorolls and I have had a lot of trash talking going between us about who can bake the best pumpkin pie. Today we are going head to head in an attempt to out bake each other, the oven mitts are off and the spoons are out!

Happy weekend lovelies :)

New Beginings.....

Image: d'n'c

Today I lost my job. My little job, the job that I had loved, the job that had taught me that work isn't all bad. It sucked. I cried, ate some ice cream as well as my beloved o sembei and watched my favorite movie.

They didn't want to let me go, offered me a few hours a week to keep me around. But my heart just wasn't in it, the delivery was abrupt, no hint of thanks for the hard work I have done getting their business off the ground, treated a bit like an anonymous factory worker rather than a friend working in a creative venture to bring the wonder of art to children. So I declined and wandered back to the drawing board staring at the blank page.

I'm old enough and tough enough to know that as one door closes another opens, but I'm kinda left thinking maybe it's time to build my own door, one with a kooky knocker and a peep hole so that I can see exactly who is out there before I let them in.

Tomorrow IS another day.

Exercise and a new blog.....

Image: Looking Glass

So the sugar crazies seem to have left me..... ahhhh. Now that normalcy has returned and I'm not stalking the streets in search of my next fix, my mind drifts to that other healthy living thing. You know the one, that thing that makes all the difference, that thing that has you zinging from head to toe, the wonderful, the amazing, EXERCISE!

I seem to have lost my mojo when it comes to exercise at the moment. The personal training group has disbanded and I'm left feeling pretty unmotivated. It's too easy to slip into my procrastination outfit and just trundle along convincing myself that walking to the train station is enough. Hmmmm.

It's really interesting to stop and see what's going on, the patterns the changes, what works, what doesn't. I hoped, maybe foolishly, that exercise would just happen but it hasn't. I still very much need structure and planning, and this is a needed step towards being someone who exercises regularly and perhaps even effortlessly.

Instead of beating myself up and moaning about not wanting to exercise, I figure I just need to do what I need to do and that's ok. This is where I am, I have direction and I'm heading there, at my own pace, in my own style and I will get there.

In other news, the blogging bug has well an truly bitten and I'm starting another. Ninja Eats is an exploration of all things food, authored by little ol me, Kenji (AKA The Boy/The Boyf) and the elusive, anonymous, Ninja. It's all very new and finding it's feet, but that's the great thing about blogs they just grow and find their own way. Hope to see you there sometime soon!

Constant Cravings

Image: jelene

Arggghhhhk. Today was a disaster day...... apple crumble with ice cream, hot chocolate, salt and vinegar chips, chocolate after dinner and another ice cream just to cement the worst day in a long time.

I'm bloated and gassy, is that classed as over sharing I wonder?? I feel like I'm sliding down the greasy slippery slope desperately trying to grasp onto something, only to find myself gaining no traction, floundering as I slide on down into to a refined carbs mess.

It started last week with bread. Bread that I proudly made myself, but bread nonetheless. White bread, that golden crisp warm straight out of the oven kind of temptation. Generous dollops of butter melting into the white warmness. I could feel something inside kick over, some kind of insanity, something other taking control. I couldn't stop at one slice, two, three, four, half the loaf gone, the horse was out of the gate, bolted.

From that day on I've had these insatiable cravings...... for what? Anything junky, as today's menu attests. Thinking back on the last few weeks, I've slipped into a predictable pattern of mine.... feeling good, feeling like I'm getting there, subconsciously freaking out and then mindlessly pigging out so that the status quo ante is well and truly returned to. Yo-yoing!

Eeeek...... refined carbs will always do it to me, it's like the more I have the more I want and on and on and on. So to cold turkey it is for me.

I guess it's good timing really, I've had the whole cholesterol matter knocking around in my head recently. Ignoring it, as you may well know, really isn't the answer. So here we go people...... 6 weeks from now I will rock up to my darling doc and get the test. In the meantime I'm going to get this jonesing under control and regain myself.