Yo-yo No More

To Blog or Not to Blog:

2009-11-16T18:55:00.005+11:00

That is the question. It seems that the blogging bug has bitten, left the building and the bite mark is no where to be seen. For now I think I'll give the blogging a rest and concentrate on growing this baby that has taken up residence. Thank you all for your kind words and support over the last year, creating this space to rant and rave has exceeded my wildest dreams. No doubt I'll see you here again in the future when it's time to hitch up the weight loss wagon and get going again.

Cravings and Aversions.

2009-10-29T15:06:00.003+11:00

Image: norwichnuts

So in my mind I thought, being newly up the duff and all, that I'd be begging Kenj to get up at some ungodly hour and make me something like the picture above. That I wouldn't be able to carry on without my crazy food fetish. I've seen the movies, watched the TV shows, read the magazines. Preggo chicks like eating weird shit right?

Well it seems not so with me. I've been hungrier than ever before but not really craved anything in the tear down the walls give me my coco pops and tomato sauce kind of way. This is mildly disappointing. I was totally ready for it, I have a pretty varied diet, I was imagining combos that would make even Andrew Zimmern squeamish.

So no cravings, what about aversions? Yes, and this has been strange.... chicken is off the cards, even looking at it in the butcher makes me feel wrong. Sadly, and much to my shock and horror vegetables are no longer the love of my life...... bland, boring and cardboard like they seem. I push them round my plate, stick them on and off my fork and generally do anything to not eat them.... eeeeek.

So here I am, imagining my unborn child starving of nutrients in the womb..... I know, I know, don't worry everything will be alright, but I am of the family way, it is my right to freak out, freaking out is right up there with wanting pickles and ice cream at 4am, I'm just allowed to do it.

I'm trying different things... vege juices are OK, although sometimes even a mouthful makes me want to yerlch all over the kitchen. Today I had success, I hid the veges. There they were lurking in a tomato base with lots of cheese, pour that over some brown rice and I'm more densely nutritious than Gillian McKeith as she screams at some poor woman about fish 'n' chips with mushy peas.

As I was chopping the veges as small as I could, so as to get them sliding straight down my throat without nary a blip on the boring foods radar, I had a thought. Maybe this is preparation, maybe this is my body's way of saying "look lady you better work out how to make veges taste good, because no kid worth their weight in rusk sticks is going to be interested in your steamed vege garbage, it ain't gunna happen".

Who knows, but whatever it is, I hope I can put cheese on it, because cheese fixes everything.

Where have I been?

2009-10-22T11:23:00.007+11:00

Image: Marco Bellucci

Well, that's a very good question... I've been off inhabiting a place inside my head, roaming around, wondering. Oh yeah, I was also in Japan.... but only for 3 weeks so not much of an excuse.

The real reason for my absence? I am up the duff bun in the oven the stalk is in a holding pattern pregnant. Yes you read that right, of the family way. This came as quite a surprise, especially to me..... aren't I the overweight, over 30, hypothyroid, borderline PCOS type that is bound to have difficulties? 8 pregnancy tests later I finally believed those two blue lines. This is really happening.

I'm still here, hungry, needing to pee and dreaming the most crazily profound dreams ever.

Progress pic, some goals and a pumpkin pie

2009-08-15T15:06:00.007+10:00

OK, I know. You can't really SEE much of what's going on under all of my layers here, dontchya love layers :) But for me this is progress. If you look at the detail, I'm wearing a skirt, Yay! And said skirt is technically above the knee, double Yay! This is progress, people, outfits are getting more colorful, the smile is getting wider and that's how things are getting measured around here these days.

So the whole not having a job thing kinda sucks. I seem to be over my curl up on the couch and block out the sun phase and have moved on to..... hmmmmm now what? Last year I gave up my career as a cardiac nurse to pursue some stress free happiness, the art school job came along and was a perfect fit, I stopped searching aimlessly, and settled into a sort of routine. I felt like I had got somewhere, made some progress, but now it doesn't really feel like that because here I am back at square one.

I'm taking this as a hippy dippy sign from the universe that I wasn't quite on the right path, that I needed to have a little wander along to see if I was headed in the right direction, and while it was nice and sunny, it was not leading me to where I am destined to go, wherever that is!

No doubt something will happen, it always does. Meanwhile I thought I'd just focus a bit more on healthy living while I wait for that gold nugget to drop out of the sky and into my bank account.

The gorgeous Hanlie who is always such an inspiration, is extra so this month. Embarking on a month of raw foods, Hanlie's green smoothies and sprouting bonanzas have got me thinking more and more about about my diet, and I've decided it's time to cut the crap and ditch the sweeties.

I work really well with goals, but I also don't work too well with total restriction, so I've set myself some goals this week, that aren't too obsessive, have some planned exceptions but are still a challenge. In case you were wondering, here they are:

No processed sugar (except for two slices of pumpkin pie today, as part of the best pumpkin pie in the world competition, more on that later)
No processed foods (except for one bowl of ramen noodles)
Exercise daily
One Yoga class

So there you have it. I've been working on the no sugar, no processed foods, exercise daily goals for a while now, years in fact, and it feels good to be working on them all at the same time. For me I think it's important to keep in mind my long term food/life/fitness goals and keep chipping away at them consistently. I may not be a clean eating, yoga doing, muscle bearing machine as yet, but I'm taking steps towards the idea, and that is a start.

The Pumpkin Pie thing is a long story, one I plan to elaborate on further over at NinjaEats, but I'll tell you this, my dear friend Chicorolls and I have had a lot of trash talking going between us about who can bake the best pumpkin pie. Today we are going head to head in an attempt to out bake each other, the oven mitts are off and the spoons are out!

Happy weekend lovelies :)

New Beginings.....

2009-08-11T23:30:00.003+10:00

Image: d'n'c

Today I lost my job. My little job, the job that I had loved, the job that had taught me that work isn't all bad. It sucked. I cried, ate some ice cream as well as my beloved o sembei and watched my favorite movie.

They didn't want to let me go, offered me a few hours a week to keep me around. But my heart just wasn't in it, the delivery was abrupt, no hint of thanks for the hard work I have done getting their business off the ground, treated a bit like an anonymous factory worker rather than a friend working in a creative venture to bring the wonder of art to children. So I declined and wandered back to the drawing board staring at the blank page.

I'm old enough and tough enough to know that as one door closes another opens, but I'm kinda left thinking maybe it's time to build my own door, one with a kooky knocker and a peep hole so that I can see exactly who is out there before I let them in.

Tomorrow IS another day.

Exercise and a new blog.....

2009-08-07T15:21:00.012+10:00

Image: Looking Glass

So the sugar crazies seem to have left me..... ahhhh. Now that normalcy has returned and I'm not stalking the streets in search of my next fix, my mind drifts to that other healthy living thing. You know the one, that thing that makes all the difference, that thing that has you zinging from head to toe, the wonderful, the amazing, EXERCISE!

I seem to have lost my mojo when it comes to exercise at the moment. The personal training group has disbanded and I'm left feeling pretty unmotivated. It's too easy to slip into my procrastination outfit and just trundle along convincing myself that walking to the train station is enough. Hmmmm.

It's really interesting to stop and see what's going on, the patterns the changes, what works, what doesn't. I hoped, maybe foolishly, that exercise would just happen but it hasn't. I still very much need structure and planning, and this is a needed step towards being someone who exercises regularly and perhaps even effortlessly.

Instead of beating myself up and moaning about not wanting to exercise, I figure I just need to do what I need to do and that's ok. This is where I am, I have direction and I'm heading there, at my own pace, in my own style and I will get there.

In other news, the blogging bug has well an truly bitten and I'm starting another. Ninja Eats is an exploration of all things food, authored by little ol me, Kenji (AKA The Boy/The Boyf) and the elusive, anonymous, Ninja. It's all very new and finding it's feet, but that's the great thing about blogs they just grow and find their own way. Hope to see you there sometime soon!

Constant Cravings

2009-08-04T23:17:00.003+10:00

Image: jelene

Arggghhhhk. Today was a disaster day...... apple crumble with ice cream, hot chocolate, salt and vinegar chips, chocolate after dinner and another ice cream just to cement the worst day in a long time.

I'm bloated and gassy, is that classed as over sharing I wonder?? I feel like I'm sliding down the greasy slippery slope desperately trying to grasp onto something, only to find myself gaining no traction, floundering as I slide on down into to a refined carbs mess.

It started last week with bread. Bread that I proudly made myself, but bread nonetheless. White bread, that golden crisp warm straight out of the oven kind of temptation. Generous dollops of butter melting into the white warmness. I could feel something inside kick over, some kind of insanity, something other taking control. I couldn't stop at one slice, two, three, four, half the loaf gone, the horse was out of the gate, bolted.

From that day on I've had these insatiable cravings...... for what? Anything junky, as today's menu attests. Thinking back on the last few weeks, I've slipped into a predictable pattern of mine.... feeling good, feeling like I'm getting there, subconsciously freaking out and then mindlessly pigging out so that the status quo ante is well and truly returned to. Yo-yoing!

Eeeek...... refined carbs will always do it to me, it's like the more I have the more I want and on and on and on. So to cold turkey it is for me.

I guess it's good timing really, I've had the whole cholesterol matter knocking around in my head recently. Ignoring it, as you may well know, really isn't the answer. So here we go people...... 6 weeks from now I will rock up to my darling doc and get the test. In the meantime I'm going to get this jonesing under control and regain myself.

What happened to cooking?

2009-07-31T14:17:00.006+10:00

Image: NeilsPhotography

Cooking is one of those things that we, as a society, seem to be doing less and less of these days, and I can't help but wonder what impact this has on our quality of life, health and relationships.

At a time in history where we have more time saving technology around us than ever before, our work hours are steadily increasing. This has a huge impact on cooking and what we eat. We're tired, stressed and hungry. We want to eat, we want to eat now. So we do, reaching for the microwavable, the packaged, the take-away, the convenience.

A woman's place is no longer in the home, she's out and about, carving out a career, picking up the kids and keeping up with the boys in order to prove her so called equality. The kitchen is empty, the cupboard bare, the local take-away is on speed dial and the knowledge, skills and awareness of food and cooking are being lost faster than a Greenpeace boat in pursuit of an illegal whaling ship.

So should the girls drop the ball, get back to the kitchen sink and lace up their apron ties? I think not. But there has to be a solution, a way for all of us to sit at the table and share a meal that was cooked with love and care. Maybe it's about priorities, encouragement, experimentation. What do you think?

Progress, it's all in the outfit.

2009-07-28T10:39:00.006+10:00

Image: Bill Brown

Now that I have said my farewells to the Scale, I've been thinking more and more about how to measure my progress. I really need achievements to be proud of to keep me going in this whole thing and while I don't need to be a number on the scale anymore I do want to see myself moving forward.

I've been taking tape measurements since the start of this adventure back in November and I have found this to be a good way to see how things are changing.

By far the best way for me really is in the clothes. Having gone from a baggy sized 18 pants being tight, to falling off when I run is surely a triumph worth celebrating. Being able to once again button up my favorite red winter coat really does put a smile on my dial, and watching my all time fattest pair of shorts get so baggy in the arse you could call me MC Hammer, is pure bliss.

I really wanted to post a progress pic today but after running around the house trying a gazillion self portraits, I've conceded defeat. I'll await the return of The Boy for a less arty shot.

So there you have it, progress measured in a way other than the scale. Here are some numbers for those of you that get into that kinda thing, the first number being the starting point and the second number where I'm at today.

Bust: 115/114cm
Waist at belly button: 114/105cm
Waist at narrowest point: 95/89cm
Hips: 127/121cm
Upper Thigh: 76/72cm
Knee: 49/47cm
Upper Arm: 36/34cm

Total centimeters lost so far: 31cm. That's more centimeters than on the 30cm ruler I used in primary school!

Dear Scale

2009-07-24T19:33:00.006+10:00

Image: Playingwithbrushes

Dear Scale,

Our time has come to an end. For years we have have kept our thing going, you looming around each corner, me obsessively seeking you out. This recent time spent apart has had me thinking about you a lot. How you have ruled my life for so long, how you've tormented me with your numbers, teased me with your smooth neutral appearance.

For some you are just that, neutral, benign. But for me, and I know you know this, you are a malignancy that knows no bounds.

So dear scale, I will not miss you, or even think of you. We both know it's better this way, we can get on with our lives and enjoy our days in peace.

Good luck
Berni x

Home Sweet Home

2009-07-19T11:34:00.004+10:00

Traveling is always fun, and one of the greatest things about it is discovering new ways to see and love your life at home. This trip was no different, and I'm pretty happy to be back, enjoying the clear blue winter skies and all that home has to offer.

So, weight loss and traveling. This combo seems to work for me, pants are sliding on a bit easier, tops not so clingy, the dreaded roll over the top of my jeans does seem to be a little smaller. The trick is to keep things moving in this direction.

Life on the road is full of obstacles, yet I seem to navigate them so much better away than when I'm at home and all is within my control. I think the biggest thing is that when I'm away I stop caring so much. I just go with the flow, eat when I'm hungry, eat what I want, and find that I'm so distracted by the adventure that I don't really think about being fat at all. Huh, who wouldda thought? Having fun and enjoying what's there to be enjoyed has me getting thinner without, counting, depriving or stressing about whether or not I've done this or that the right way.

I'm always dreaming of a life of full-time travel, and while I'm working on that plan, I also need to live my life now, and it seems that living as if I'm traveling may just be the way to do it. So off I go into the wide blue yonder in search of adventure right here in my own backyard.

Travel

2009-06-24T05:56:00.012+10:00

This trip is proving to be a pretty solitary experience. The Boyf's work has been extended by 2 weeks, and his monster days mean that I'm left to wander the streets, explore many many ye olde buildings, trawl the museums and hunt out the good eats on my lonesome.

All this time to myself has left me feeling pretty lost for words so I thought I'd share some of my photos instead.

Weight Loss Weekly

2009-06-22T10:41:00.002+10:00

Another week zooms by and it's time for Weight Loss Weekly, a collaborative blogging experiment where Sunny, Joie and I discuss our efforts at weight loss. Lately the gals and I have been talking about exercise, which at times is evasive, other times right there under my feet tripping me over.

My goal has been to incorporate exercise into my life each and everyday, and so far I've been able to do that. My main source of exercise has been walking, and bit by bit I'm adding in some simple body weight exercises, squats, sit-ups and my Everest of exercise, push-ups.

Push-ups have always been an enigma to me, and it seems they are keeping their mystery for now. I've been working on the hundred push up challenge consistently for a month and I don't feel like I've got any better. Persevere I will, I'm taking this as an opportunity to prove to myself that I can keep going, commit to something and put the effort in order to enjoy the rewards. If anyone has got any pointers on pushups I'd love to hear them, shout out in the comments.

Doing daily exercise is important for me, it keeps me on track and makes me feel energised and motivated. I think the key to sustaining this is that it's moderate exercise, nothing too strenuous or draining. Right now, it's all about doing something, moving and enjoying it.

My goal this week is to keep up the daily walking, squats, pushups and situps, which I do every second day. I am going to add in some more body weight exercises on the alternate days, some back exercises, more leg work and holding plank, hopefully the core work will help with the pushups.

Don't forget to check out and cheer on Joie as she exercises through her week at Joie de vivre: An amateur gourmet's guide.
Sunny is off on her family vacation this week, enjoying some sun and will be back next week to check in.

Weight Loss Weekly

2009-06-15T17:30:00.004+10:00

"Follow your inner moonlight; don't hide the madness"
Allen Ginsberg

I look in the mirror and I don't see rock hard abs nor thighs of steel, but what I do see is someone who is trying and that makes me smile.

Weight Loss Weekly is a collaborative blogging endeavor. Sunny, Joie and I get together to talk goals, with exercise being the theme for now. Check out how the girls went this week with their exercise goals.

Joie: "Summer for me means cute dresses and tank tops. And what do tank tops reveal? My arms, which are looking more toned!" read more at Joie de vivre: An amateur gourmet's guide Joie de vivre: An Amateur gourmet's guide

Sunny: "I've been feeling a little bit lazy this week. I started out good, I actually stepped foot into a gym on Wednesday..." read more at at That Extra 20 Pounds

I'm still exercising every day, I've even upped the ante a bit this week adding in squats, sit-ups and yoga to the push-ups routine, which has been a good challenge, not just in a physical way but also in that comeongirlyou'vecommittedtothisyoucandoitgogogo type way.

Being away from home has actually made it easier, which is a much welcomed surprise. Life is much simpler when you're on holiday, sleep, eat, explore and repeat. The Boy has been busy working, working, working so I have been left on my own which has been kinda nice, there's something about having to rely on yourself that has it's own kind of quiet appeal.

On our last day in York I was lucky enough to score the work hire car to myself, and in an absolutely uncharacteristic impulse, I drove off down the hedged countryside roads sans map, and on a mission to conquer my usually overwhelmingly strong lack of direction.

My spontaneity was well rewarded when I stumbled upon Fountains Abbey and my exercise for the day was well and truly sorted. I wandered around the grounds of the now ruined monastery, amazed at the grandeur and peace of the place. The walk through the surrounding gardens and forest was like stepping into one of my childhood story books and I couldn't help but grin at my fortune, what a life!

This week, I'm feeling determined and most of all willing. If you didn't catch Mizfit's post on this wonderful word, I urge you to check it out, get inspired and get exercising!

Greetings from the UK

2009-06-10T19:44:00.010+10:00

"The air was soft, the stars so fine, the promise of every cobbled alley so great that I thought I was in a dream"
Jack Kerouac

It's such a joy to be fortunate enough to travel. I love everything about it, the challenges, the surprises, the opportunity for contemplation and yes I do love airplane food. Some highlights so far.....

A wonderfully, sunblessed wander through the countryside, complete with wildflowers, historical buildings, meandering streams and of course a Sunday Roast with Yorkshire Pudding all washed down with locally brewed apple cider.

Wandering and more wandering, getting lost on the little streets and being gobsmacked by the history and architecture of York.
There's so much more, The National Art Gallery, Trafalgar Square, the people, food markets, the endless daylight, the way I feel like I understand Australia in a whole new context.

The whole exercise thing has been a breeze, walking, walking and more walking is the order of the day and I've even managed to keep up with the push-ups as well as adding in a bit of yoga, such is my enthusiasm for the traveling life.

Thanks again for all your comments and encouragement, I feel so lucky to have stumbled upon this little corner of the internet, I really feel like I can do this, and I think that it has a lot to do with all of you. Happy travels.

Weight Loss Weekly

2009-06-08T17:30:00.002+10:00

Image: vegm8383

"Zen is not some kind of excitement, but concentration on our regular routine"
Shunryu Suzuki

This week was definitely harder, and it's got me wondering if every day exercise is too much?

Weight Loss Weekly is a collaborative blogging endeavour. Sunny, Joie and I get together to talk goals, with exercise being the theme for now. This week Sunny is off to celebrate her 5th wedding anniversary and is having a week away from WLW. Congratulations Sunny enjoy your break. you can catch Sunny's adventures over at That Extra 20 Pounds.

Be sure to catch up with Joie and find out how her week of walking went. "Hooray! I hit a breakthrough this week!" read more at Joie de vivre: an amateur gourmet's guide

I did manage to exercise each day, but it was a struggle, I needed a great deal of persuasion to get up and get going and what constituted as exercise became a bit less intentional, a gentle wander with the dogs, sprinting for the train. I spose these things fit into the something is better than nothing category.

I'm hoping the next week will have a bit more structure. The flight to London was tiring, I think I'm still running on pure excitement and as a result the definition of exercise has become even more vague. Today we have a walk in the countryside planned, which I'm really looking forward to, I'm hoping it will restore my exercise ambition and that I'll be able to prove to myself that I can keep on with my basic habits no matter where I am and what I'm doing.

So to plan to plan or not to plan this is the next question. I guess I will go as far as to plan my push up days, which will be Monday, Wednesday and Friday, but the rest is left up to chance for now, much like this whole trip.

As far as the exercise everyday goal goes, I am pressing on in an effort to make my day to day life more active and inspired, to get me feeling more able to leap out into the world and move forward. I'm feeling like this trip is a great opportunity for me to demonstrate to myself that I can do this, anytime, anywhere.

I'm curious, are you able to stick to an exercise plan when your routine is totally changed? Any tips on keeping on keeping on with it all when on holiday?

Weight Loss Weekly

2009-06-01T17:30:00.002+10:00

Image: The mofo JT

"Resistance is useless"
Dr Who

Monday is Weight Loss Weekly time, when Joie, Sunny and myself get together and talk weight loss. The gals and I are focusing on exercise at the moment, going forth and creating new, wonderful, healthy habits.

Check out how the ladies went this week:

Joie of Joie de vivre: An amateur gourmet's guide

Sunny: "The second week of my exercise plan! Ugh, and it was so much harder for me to stay motivated this week..." keep reading at That Extra 20 Pounds

Another week of daily exercise, can you believe it? I'm amazed. I even did push ups! Despite the crazy week, I managed to exercise every day yet again. This week was a challenge, being at The Folks' place and helping Ma organise doctor's visits and the like, left me feeling pretty tired and unmotivated. All in all I think I proved to myself that I can do this, I can make this a habit and I can stick to it.

I think what really helped me this week was deciding that exercise was my priority, I planned, I got up early and I got it done. It was also nice to think that I was showing my Mum that doing exercise every day isn't really that hard, she joined me on a few walks and it was great to get off the couch and into the fresh air together.

I've always loved walking, and this week I was reminded how much I love walking in the bush. My goal for when I get back from Europe will be to get out of the inner city once a week, find some green and walk til my heart's content.

This week the exercise plan is incomplete, I leave for London on Thursday and I'm not sure what the weekend will hold. My idea is to approach the rest of the week with a spirit of adventure. I usually have no problem exercising when I'm traveling, I really enjoy walking around and exploring, but the real challenge will be keeping on with the push ups.

Monday: 3omin elliptical trainer and day 1, week 3 pushups
Tuesday: Personal training
Wednesday: 1 hr walk and day 2, week 3 pushups
Thursday: 30min elliptical trainer and day 3, week 3 pushups

So, for me, the exercise continues, how about you? Have you got an exercise plan this week?

Guest Post: So you want to lose weight and keep it of?

2009-05-28T22:45:00.003+10:00

Image: kharied

Let me introduce you to the fabulous Rebecca of Chow and Chatter. Rebecca is a a dietitian, personal trainer, writer, mother, wife, cook and blogging extraordinaire. She's taken some time out of her day to share with us some of her tips on losing weight and the elusive keeping it off.

On the surface it seems simple to lose weight eat less and be more active however the number of overweight and obese people continues to rise. People try many strategies in an attempt to lose weight often the latest Hollywood diet or fad. How often do you hear the words I am on a diet or I’ll eat what I want before I start my diet, many times losing weight while on the so called diet only to re-gain it and some when they return to their usual eating habits. This yo yo cycle isn’t healthy for mind or body. Thats my Bernie's Blog yo yo no more caught my eye as she understands. She blogs with Sunny of that extra 20 lb and Joie of Joie de Vivre who inspire each other and folks around the globe with great tips and their personal stories.

The best approach is to work towards a healthy lifestyle and make long –term changes, also be patient with yourself it won't happen over night, there will be good and bad days along the way but you can do it one step at a time. It's also of great benefit to work with a dietitian to give you that much needed support, or consider using the services of a personal trainer.

Consider these questions before beginning

How ready am I to change? if you are thinking about it but still not all that motivated brainstorm the health benefits and focus on how much better you would feel

Break down your barriers to change-write a list and work through them, develop good time management and prioritize time for you to cook and be active

Do you eat when hungry or for other reasons such as emotions, habit or boredom. Try keeping a food diary and recording when and what you eat and how you were feeling, or write a blog. Work towards a regular meal schedule and listen to your bodies cues to eat when hungry

Do you perceive certain foods as good and bad and follow dieting rules? Re-program your mind and have a healthy relationship with food there’s no good or bad foods you just need to get the balance right

Eat slowly – it takes time for the brain to get the message that your full

Develop effective emotional coping strategies try not to use food for comfort, break the cycle of eating when stressed then feeling guilty. Call a friend, take a walk, pray, have a hot bath and try yoga.

Increase physical activity try to find activities that can be worked into your daily life you don’t have to join a gym. Take the stairs, walk on your breaks, try pilates and yoga at home or take a class, get some weights and lift at home, try tennis with friends and family or get a bike, find lots of activities you enjoy and have fun!

Overtime as you work towards a healthy lifestyle and face each challenge in a positive way you’ll slowly start to feel stronger more in control and enjoy better health.

A fork in the road......

2009-05-27T12:43:00.009+10:00

Image: webmink

"Do or don't do..... there is no try"
Yoda

I have had an interesting experience this past week, a glimpse into my future if you like. My dearest Ma has been in hospital twice in the last two weeks, her blood pressure through the roof. I've come to stay with The Folks to give support, translate the Dr speech and maybe just maybe give Ma a gentle nudge in a healthier direction.

It got me thinking about me. What I do in life that keeps me from being my healthiest, what choices I make which mean that true change is kept out of reach, and I can see that I'm not that different to my wonderful Ma.

I remember when I was still nursing I often wondered about the road my patients had walked before they got to me. When, if ever, they got an early warning sign of their impending demise, what they did at this time, what choices they made, what areas of their lives they prioritsed. If, given that time again, would they do anything differently, would they stop eating the junk, start exercising, give up the smokes? I often imagined them at a fork in the road, much like the fork in the road my Ma is standing at now.

This morning I went for a long muddy walk out into the bush, it really is paradise here, the green that stretches on for as far as the eyes can see, the streams and rivers, the animals, the calm. There amongst the tree ferns and the still of the morning air I realised I too am at a fork in the road.

I can continue on with my half-assed attempts to get my cholesterol down, my inconsistent eating habits, my sporadic exercise and I will more than probably end up somewhere right about where my Mum is when I'm her age, or possibly even younger. I could take a left, walking down that muddy path into the green, the peace, the calm and alter my destiny, reach that true state of change. I know which way I need to go, which way I will go. Do you?

Weight Loss Weekly

2009-05-25T18:26:00.007+10:00

Image: Earthwatcher

"The most important thing about having goals is having one"
Abert F. Geoffrey

So I did it. I exercised every day last week. Yippee! The whole plan thing actually worked really well. I wasn't able to stick to it to the letter but I think having the intention is what really counts for me.

Weight Loss Weekly is a collaborative blogging adventure where Sunny, Joie and little old me set some healthy lifestyle goals each week and document our progress together.

Check out how the other gals went this week with their mission to get things moving.

Sunny: "I guess I don't hate exercising as much as I thought I did. I did pretty darn well this week, for me..." more at ThatExtra20Pounds

Joie: "Monday's inner monologue: "Uggh! Six o'clock already? What was I thinking?" Did I achieve my exercise goal? Find out at Joie de vivre: An amateur gourmet's guide

Rain seemed to be the big issue but I managed to negotiate the weather and get things done. My favorite exercise moment this week was a long muddy bush walk with the Soul Sistah yesterday after getting flooded out from The Folks' place and finally making it here amongst the mist and the trees.

Here are a few things I found helped me reach my goal this week:

Planning when I would fit in my exercise for the next day.
Realising that something is better than nothing
Exercising in the morning, gets it done, gets me moving and gets me feeling good all day long
Making the plan, I felt it set me up for the week with a clear goal in mind

So this week the daily exercise goal continues and this is my general aim for the week:

Today 30min on stationary bike and Day 1 week 2 onehundredpushups
Tuesday bush walk
Wednesday bush walk and Day 2 week 2 pushups
Thursday 30min stationary bike
Friday 30min elliptical trainer Day 3 week 2 pushups
Saturday 1hr walk
Sunday 1 hr walk

Share away in the comments, are you setting some new goals and working towards reaching them? Let's cheer each other on and make those changes we know we really want.

Guest Post Gallivanting

2009-05-24T23:59:00.001+10:00

If you feel you need to read more of my ramblings at a different address, wander on over to Rebecca's fab blog Chow and Chatter, stay a while look around, I'm sure you'll enjoy.

5 Things I'm Proud Of #17

2009-05-22T00:30:00.007+10:00

Image: taivasalla

"Oh no! I should do something..... but I'm already in my pajamas"
Prof Farnsworth. Futurama

If you'd like a double dose of my ramblings today, check out my musings on exercising at home over at the baby incubating, wonder woman that is Fit Fig.

Friday is the day I like to reflect on my week and think of 5 things I've done that I can be proud of. This exercise has really helped me to get out of my self doubting rut, recognise the small achievements I make in my day and generally become an annoying Positive Polly, I ain't apologising one bit!

So here are my five things. What about yours? I'm sure you did something this week that made you smile. Dare to share below?

So far sticking with my exercise everyday goal that I set this week.
Not letting the rain and my lack of motivation to go walking stop me, long live the elliptical trainer and being able to wear my PJ's whilst exercising.
Literally kicking my way through training this week, despite being given the option to cancel.
Living it up spontaneous style and booking a ticket to London, leaving in 2 weeks, wooo hooo!
Drinking less caffeinated beverages and drinking more herbal tea.

My New Shoes

2009-05-19T22:15:00.006+10:00

Image: ericsnels

"There's nothing like putting your bare feet into fresh cow dung on a cold day, it's great"
Makhaya Ntini

I really should be writing something about cholesterol but I'm just so excited about my new shoes. They're called Vibram FiveFingers® and they totally rock.

I'd read about these shoes a while back and admired them on a few feet but alas alack they weren't available in Oz at the time. Fast forward to not long ago when I saw them in a shop window and haven't been able to stop thinking about them since. I love being barefoot, a stilleto shod lady I am not, so the idea of being able to get around, protected from the ground, but feeling like I'm shoeless is like heaven to me.

Vibram FiveFingers® have a flexible vibram sole and individual toe sections that keep your toes separated and able to move independently. It's an unusual yet logical concept. There are a variety of styles to chose from, ranging from a neat slip on to a cold weather enclosed shoe.

The theory is, as it turns out, that our feet are designed to carry us. A lifetime of shoe wearing not only weakens the muscles in our feet causing problems such as plantar fasciitis but has ramifications the whole body over resulting in postural imbalances and back problems. Everyone has seen and been shocked at the old lady foot, her strange misshapen toes, bunions and corns often the result of tight shoes.

I have the makings of some of these problems, and wonder if it's my sore feet that have lead to my dodgy knee. That's part of the reason I finally forked over the cash and got myself a pair. I'm hoping after a few months, my feet will feel stronger and less stiff, time will tell.

As soon as I put them on I was amazed at how comfortable they were. I feel like I have more balance and more control, and feeling the ground under my feet is fantastic. I haven't done any long distance walking in them yet, but general getting around and about has been no trouble at all.

Check out some reviews at:
The Four Hour Work Week
A Passion For Running
RunningSoules

Also:
birthday shoes, a site dedicated to Vibram FiveFingers® and bare feet.

What do you think? Interested in getting back to nature with some high tech rubber between you and the world? Happy with your faithful trainers? Let me know, comment down below.

Weight Loss Weekly

2009-05-18T17:30:00.003+10:00

Image: kevindooley

The gals and I are shaking things up a bit with Weight Loss Weekly. While we love hearing each others take's on different issues, we felt it wasn't especially action based blogging, and we're all about the action!

In order for us to get up and get doing we thought we'd pick a theme and then set our own individual goals within that theme and talk strategy and such.

This week's idea is scintillating, it's sassy and of course it's supersonic, it's exercise, yippeee!

Don't forget to check out what the gals have got to say on this one.

Joie: "My goal this week is to walk for 20 minutes for 4 days this week. It doesn't seem like a huge goal, but considering it's been a month (or longer) since I've accomplished this feat, I'm a little nervous!" read more at Joie de vivre: a amateur gourmet's guide

Sunny "If you read last week's WLW post, you probably know how much of a slacker I've been when it comes to exercise! But I've set two goals this week..." Keep reading at That Extra 20 Pounds

For me exercise comes and goes, I go through stages where I feel like I've got it all worked out, and then for no obvious reason I hit a wall and just can't seem to get into it. I've smashed up against said wall these last few weeks and I'm determined to get out of my rut and back on the wagon. You know that feeling, when you pull on your jeans and think "hmmm something's not right here......" Well I'm getting that vibe and I need to snap out of it. An upcoming trip to the UK is the motivation, I do not want to get on that plane feeling flabby and disappointed.

My goal this week is to do some kind of exercise each day. It doesn't have to be formal sweatercise but just something, movement, action, doing.

In some areas of my life I am a crazy planner, but I've never tried to apply this to exercise so this week I am going to plan out my exercise and see if that helps. Fig of fitfig does this and I've often admired her plans and wondered if that would work for me, well wonder no more here we go.

Monday: Elliptical trainer 30min
Tuesday: Personal training with the girlies
Wednesday: 1hr walk with the Luscious L
Thursday: Yoga
Friday: Walk to work 1hr
Saturday: Elliptical trainer 30min
Sunday: Bush walk

So there you have it the happy plan. With it all written down so neatly like that, I feel like I'm sure to get it done, let's see.

How do you make sure you get your exercise done and dusted week to week? Have you got it all planned out? Or do you just let it flow?

5 Things I'm Proud of #16

2009-05-16T20:09:00.004+10:00

Image: Tomás Rotger

"When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be"
Lao Tzu

Running late with this post, seems to be a theme I've had going all week. Nevertheless there are things I'm proud of. I feel like I've strayed off course a bit lately but jumping back on as of today and keeping on keeping on.

Remembering that I don't like working weekends, and keeping it that way.
Finally writing a post on fat and cholesterol
Meeting the Luscious L for an early morning walk
Restarting the 100 push-up challenge
Getting back on the elliptical trainer after a few weeks of absence

What about you, climbed any mountains this week?

Fat and Cholesterol

2009-05-14T12:28:00.003+10:00

Image: Gareth.Thorne

"It's a scientific fact your body will not absorb cholesterol if you take it from another person's plate"
Dave Barry

Hey hey, today I'm also guesting over at the fantabulous, the funtastic, the free thinking, MizFit Online. Check it out here.

As I continue along the road of The Great Cholesterol Challenge, I find my self tripping over, falling down and getting up again, confused. Where did that hole in the road come from and why is it full of Ferrero Rocher chocolate?

Nevertheless, onward I go, Rome wasn't built in a day and neither was the perfect diet.

So, the whole cholesterol and fat thing. Not so simple. As many of you know there's fat and then there's fat and then there's transfat just to make things interesting. Some people say avoid all fats, some say it's just saturated fat that is bad, then there's those that believe that saturated fat isn't the culprit at all.

Mary Enig PhD is a big advocate for the conscious inclusion of saturated fats in our diets and has written extensively on the topic. If you're interested, her article, written with Sally Fallon, The Skinny on Fats, is well worth the read.

Another great read is from Harvard School of Public Health and talks more about eating the right kinds of fats.

Enough of that, on to practicalities.

Saturated Fat

Saturated fats are found in a variety of foods, and the general consensus is that these fats contribute to elevated cholesterol levels and should be enjoyed occasionally. These foods include:

Beef
Chicken with the skin on
Processed Meats
Butter
Cream
Lard
Chocolate
Ice cream
Pastries, biscuits and cakes
Fried foods
Full fat dairy products-milk, cheese, yogurt
Coconut oil

Trans fat

Trans fat or partially hydrogenated vegetable oil, was once considered the bees knees. Not so any more. This oil is used in many processed foods and should be avoided at all costs. Denmark is leading the way in banning the use of these oils in Danish food. Hopefully other countries will follow suit. Darya at the wonderful Summertomato directed me to this recent study that further indicates the role of trans fat in cardiovascular disease. Read your labels and ditch the trans.
Foods likely to contain trans fat include:

Biscuits, cakes and pastries
Fast food
Fried food
Margarines and spreads
Donuts
Check your labels, it can be hiding anywhere

Dietary Cholesterol

To eat eggs or not to eat eggs? That is the question. While the concept that foods that contain cholesterol will raise blood cholesterol makes some sense, this idea is no longer considered the rule. It appears that the effect dietary cholesterol has on blood levels is not as great as once speculated.

The folks over at Harvard recommend enjoying eggs as part of a heart healthy diet, while of course exercising that wonderful notion, moderation. Although eggs and other cholesterol containing foods are now considered off the "bad" list it seems that there are some of us who need to continue being vigilant. It appears some individuals blood cholesterol levels do increase when they consume cholesterol containing foods, which include:

Eggs
Organ meat-liver, heart, brain, kidney
Butter
Prawns
Caviar

Good Fats

Just as fat can be bad, fat can also be good. Monopolyomegapaloooza so many goodies to be had.

Omega 3 fat, a type of polyunsaturated fat, is considered a goody, found commonly in:

Tuna
Salmon
Mackerel
Herring
Anchovies
Sardines
For those not interest in the fishes, try flax seed, chia seed and walnuts for your omega 3

Polyunsaturated fats. The word from the American as well as Australian Heart Foundations is that these fats are considered heart friendly and can be found in:

Canola oil
Sunflower oil
Safflower oil
Soybean oil
Sesame oil
Nuts and seeds

Monounsaturated fats can also be considered good and you'll find them in:

Olive oil
Nuts and seeds
Avocado

Final Word

There is much talk about fat and while there are all sorts of lists, guidelines and recommendations, I tend to stick to the principles of whole foods. For me this means, I do eat chicken skin, I do eat full fat dairy and the occasional serve of golden butter from grass fed cows, and I also value the many health benefits of the humble coconut and the misunderstood egg. I make a pretty serious attempt at moderation most of the time, and I also include plenty of foods that help to lower cholesterol.

The verdict seems to be that we need fat in our diets, it's about making the right choices and not over doing it.

What do you think? Are you a fat free devotee? Or, like me, is fat something you feel you need?

I got an award!!!!

2009-05-12T10:14:00.004+10:00

I got an award! I love awards. The fabulous Rebecca of Chow and Chatter gave me this Awe-Summmm award. Rebecca is a Registered Dietitian in the UK and USA and has a wealth of experience and knowledge that she shares very generously on her blog. She also posts some damn delicious looking recipes for you to try if you dare. Be sure to check out her blog, you won't be disappointed that you did.

As part of this award I am meant to share 7 awesome thing about myself so here goes *blush*

I once ate a fish eye ball to impress The Boyf. I think that's pretty awesome.
I'm interested in people and their stories
Always up for adventure
Positive
Easy going
I once won a challenge at the gym on the rowing machine.... I was pretty pleased with my awesomeness that day.
I LOVE dogs, I know that's not amazingly awesome, but I bet all the dogs I pat or say hello to in the street think I'm awesome!

In return I am passing this award on to some wonderful bloggers that keep me laughing and inspired all the day long.

Joie, Sunny and Nurit, my Weight Loss Weekly buddies, who so kindly invited me to join them on their fantastic collaborative blogging adventure. Their blogs are delicious, inspiring and they themselves are pretty darn cool too.

Spring Girl a fellow Aussie blogger who writes wonderfully about weight loss and all the amazing self discovery she's having along the way.

Weight Loss Weekly

2009-05-11T17:00:00.001+10:00

Image: kevindooley

"I don't exercise. If God had wanted me to bend over he would have put diamonds on the floor"
Joan Rivers

Weight Loss Weekly is a collaborative blogging effort between the fantabulous Joie,Sunny and myself. As Nurit explained last week she's decided to leave us for WLW. Be sure to watch out for her delicious and insightful posts at 1 Family Friendly Food as well as Good Food Bad Food.

This week I asked this:
Exercise is something everyone should be doing for general health and fitness. Do you have any tips for keeping your exercise routine fun and most importantly sustainable?

Check out the gals and what they've got to say.

Sunny: "Exercise... that is a subject I've been trying to avoid and not think since I began my weight loss journey a few months ago..." keep reading at www.ThatExtra20Pounds.blogspot.com

Joie: "It seems that no matter how fun I make exercise, I have trouble with the sustainability part. Is it a momentum thing?" Read more at Joie de vivre: An amateur gourmet's guide

Friends, flexibility and reality are the three things I try to keep in mind when exercising. I don't really have a routine to speak of, and this, I am learning, is actually my exercise style. Change is what keeps me going and the more I build exercise into everyday activities the more likely it is that it will be something I can maintain.

Exercising with friends is not only fun but sets up a scenario where you have a responsibility to turn up. For the last month or so a group of friends and I have been meeting with a trainer in a local park. We sweat, cheer each other on and laugh through the 45min of 'fun' and then it's done. This is something I can keep doing week after week, mainly because I'm doing it with the girls, it's like we're a team, and I would never want to let this team down.

Flexibility is a must when it comes to exercise for me. Rigid timetables and routines just don't work. I exercise when I can and when I want to. For the last 2 weeks this hasn't been all that often, a mix of not the right time and not really wanting to. But I feel like it's just been a phase to go through and after yesterday's hot yoga class I'm ready to get back into it. It's taken me a long time to realise there are ebbs and flows in all areas of my life, including exercise and sometimes you just have to go with it to find your groove.

Reality is important. For me this means, realistic exercise with realistic goals. At the moment a gym bunny I am not, so to pay the ridiculous joining fees and rock up in my most clean of workout wear would not be realistic at all. So I walk, I walk to work, I walk to the shops, I walk for fun, I walk to clear my head. This is absolutely realistic for me.

I can't talk about fun, sustainable exercise without mentioning The Wonderfully Fandangled Exercise Machine, or the elliptical trainer as it's known in the real world. This piece of engineering genius has been the best investment I've made in years. I have it set up in my lounge room and The Boyf has rigged up a laptop stand on it so I can watch all my favorite geeky DVDs as I sweat myself into oblivion. The best bit is I can do all this in my pyjamas/underpants/apron/dressing gown. I LOVE it.

I think in the past I've had an idea of what exercise "should" look like, I thought it involved lycra and group classes and all things pump and body blast. When I couldn't do that I thought I was failling. Now I'm trying to find the me in exercise, what is my exercise groove, my style, my fun.

What's your exercise groove? Do you have any tips or tricks that keep you on the straight and narrow. I'd love to learn more, this exercise newbie needs all the help she can get!

5 Things I'm Proud Of #15

2009-05-08T08:48:00.001+10:00

"Cooking is like love. It should be entered into with abandon or not at all"
Harriet Van Horne

This week I have a theme of which I am proud of, and that theme is cooking. To know the men in my life is to know brilliant cooks, cooking for them is a daunting, nerve wracking experience, but I have vowed to overcome it and join in on the fun. So this week I am super proud of the dishes I created all on my own.

Buddha's Delight, a Chinese vegetarian dish that traditionally includes 18 varieties of vegetable to represent the 18 Buddhas.
Steamed whole Barramundi with ginger and shallots. A whole fish seems such a treat, but it's actually really easy, especially if you leave the gutting and scaling to your local fish monger.
Cooking a traditional Vietnamese stock for the almighty Phố from scratch. Three days of boiling and toiling paid off with a deliciously aromatic stock, the perfect background for the fresh herbs and powerful flavours of the offal.
Creating juicy juicy Thai style Gai Yang (ไก่ย่าง). BBQ chicken wings, which were cooked outdoors over the coals as part of the Phố extravaganza.
Making Thai style fish cakes from scratch as part of the Phố feast.

How bout you? Cook anything exciting this week? What about other steps you've taken that mean you are living the life you want? Time to get proud.

What foods help in lowering cholesterol?

2009-05-05T22:13:00.009+10:00

"Let food be thy medicine and let thy medicine be food"
Hippocrates

Back to The Great Cholesterol Challenge. I thought I'd leave it up to the National Cholesterol Education Program, The Mayo Clinic and for some Australian figures, The Heart and Diabetes Institute to explain what healthy cholesterol levels are. This is also a good thing to talk to your Doctor about because there are different reference ranges related to your risk of cardiovascular disease.

On to the exciting stuff, food. I am constantly surprised at how powerful food has been in my life. Be it cutting back on sugar and loosing the crazy mood swings or eating more protein and having more energy, the relationship between what we eat and how we feel both physically and emotionally isn't something to be sneezed at. The case of cholesterol and food is no different.

The Lipid Management Guidelines for Australians and New Zealanders recommends that dietary management of elevated cholesterol levels be tried before any drug treatment. Unfortunately, as Darya at Summer Tomato points out, most GPs as well as cardiologists aren't well versed in nutrition and most can't offer us much more advice than; eat less meat and eat more veges, as my Dr told me.

There's much more to it than that and this is what some of it looks like.

Foods to enjoy

Almonds and Walnuts have been shown to reduce LDL due to monounsaturated fat content.
Apples contain pectin which is shown to reduce cholesterol levels.
Avocado is high in monounsaturated fats, avocado improves cholesterol levels.
Barley contains soluble fiber which lowers cholesterol.
Legumes have been shown to lower cholesterol through liver pathways.
Carrots contain beta carotene a powerful antioxidant which helps reduce the risk of cardiovascular disease. Carrots also work on lowering cholesterol through reducing absorption of cholesterol.
Garlic contains allicin which is the constituent linked to it's cholesterol lowering properties.
Grapefruit has also been shown to lower cholesterol. Please discuss including grapefruit in your diet if you are on medication as grapefruit and especially the juice, has interactions with many different meds.
Shiitake, Maitake and Enoki mushrooms have been shown to lower cholesterol due to increased excretion.
Oats contain soluble fiber which has been shown to lower cholesterol.
Olive oil, which is consumed in high quantities in a Mediterranean diet has been shown to be a factor in maintaining healthy cholesterol levels.
Fatty fish such as salmon, mackerel, tuna, herring and anchovies contain omega 3 fatty acids which have been shown to assist in lowering cholesterol. I've talked more about the benefits of fish here.

This list is far from exhaustive, but it's a start. Not only are these foods specifically heart healthy they are also packed with nutrients that can benefit all of us no matter what our state of health. How many of these foods did you eat today?

Weight Loss Weekly

2009-05-04T19:49:00.001+10:00

Image: heather

"How easy for those who do not bulge to not overindulge"
Ogden Nash

Hello Monday! Monday is when the WLW gals and I get together and share thoughts about weight loss.

This week Nurit asks:
You’re about to go to an event - party, wedding, potluck, etc - where there’s going to be lots of (free) food. What are you doing about it? What is your strategy?

This is such a great question, I can't wait to hear what the gals have to say, be sure to check their musings out, no doubt there will be some tips and ideas that will get us all into action.

Joie: "I wish I could tell you that I always behave well at potlucks or buffets, but sadly, I can't. There is a reason why I am overweight! But I do have some tricks to help my best intentions along." Read more at Joie de vivre: An amateur gourmet's guide

Nurit: "An imaginary scenario: you go to a party, you see all the wonderful food, you either decide “I’ll only try just one bite of some dishes that look good”, or you don’t even think about it and just go with the flow. The result – you feel over-stuffed, you think “I ate too much. Why did I do that?” Does this sound familiar?" Read more on 1 Family Friendly Food

Sunny: "When it comes to free food, forget it! My strategy? Unfortunately it's Eat, Eat, Eat..." keep reading at www.ThatExtra20Pounds.blogspot.com

Now here's what I'm thinking about this one:

Lots of free food did you say? I'm there. That about sums up my love of the event/party/wedding/potluck food related scenario. Lots of free food is like, well, lots of free food, does it get any better? But is it really free? (see where I'm going with that.... ohhh the witty intelligence is too much). My answer to this question is a very loud NO!

You know how it goes, the food is laid out, you pick up your plate, determined to sample a tiny bit of everything, you go in with the best of intentions, and sit down to find your plate groaning from all that is piled atop it. Then out comes more food and more and more and more and you find yourself thinking, "well I did say I was going to try a little bit of everything, it's a party after all, time to celebrate." And what do you do? You eat more.

Finally once the last drop of sticky delight has been squeezed out of the bottle of dessert wine and the plates and glasses are clinking, sink bound, you gather up your bloated self and start to waddle out the door. This is what I've always done, each and every time there was some kind of food related socialising going on, which is very often in my world.

But no more, I have strategies and surprise surprise they work!

Don't go to said food feast hungry, have a snack before you leave, arrive feeling neutral in the hunger stakes, not stuffed nor frothing at the mouth like a rabid animal on the look out for the first morsel

Position your self away from the food, or if possible in front of the healthy options, you know the ones, the salads, maybe even the vege sticks

If you're worried about there being no healthy options to get positioned in front of, and it's appropriate, bring your own

Be mindful of how you're feeling and remember you don't need to try everything on offer, you will get a chance to eat some of these foods again one day

Most importantly, have fun, these times are usually about some great celebration, so celebrate. Catch up with old friends, make new ones, enjoy and savor the food

So there you have it, my ways to survive the free food without having to undo the top button of my pants half way through the event. How about you? Any ideas, tips or tricks?

The Don't Go Hungry Diet Update

2009-05-03T16:51:00.001+10:00

Image: val'sphotos'

"The pleasure of eating is not in the costly flavor, but in yourself"
Horace

A big HELLOOO to anyone who's wandered on over from Dr Amanda's newsletter. I hope my little stories help, inspire or at the least entertain you.

I've consistently been following the principles in Dr Amanda's amazing book The Don't Go Hungry Diet for a month or so now and I've noticed some nice changes around here. If you'd like to find out more about Dr Amanda and her research you can read what I think about it all right here.

The Don't Go Hungry Diet isn't really a diet in the traditional sense of the word, rather it is what our bodies do naturally and if we listen to them we may just find they've got something to say that is well worth hearing.

Here are some of the changes I've noticed since I've tried to eat when I'm actually hungry and eat enough so that I'm satisfied.

I don't really have any mad cravings
I don't feel as though I have to exert will power of steel to resist temptations
My most hungriest times of the day are 1130am and 4pm
There are many types of hunger, some for a meal and some for a snack
It doesn't take that much to fill me up
I can lose weight without feeling deprived and deranged, even when I'm faced with a month of celebrations and chocolate!

Like anything, this is a process, and I am far from having it all worked out. I still let myself get too hungry sometimes, and yes, I still overeat every now and then, but not as often and I don't have all the guilt and failure with it. I really feel like this is a missing part of the "lifestyle change" puzzle and if I can master this who knows what will happen, maybe I really will yo-yo no more.

5 Things I'm Proud Of #14

2009-05-01T10:25:00.003+10:00

Image: rwangsa

"Excuse me while I kiss the sky"
Jimi Hendrix

Well it's that time of the week again, time to remember all the little steps you are taking towards your bigger goals, or even the steps you are taking everyday to make your life what it is right now. Today I realised how far I have come in my thinking about weight loss and health and I believe it has a lot to do with these posts. Taking some time at the end of my week to think about the things I have done that have been positive is, well pretty neat if I may say so myself.

I've spent many years of dieting focusing on the negative, all the things I didn't do, all the things I should do, the "bad" food, the lack of will-power. I'm thinking this may have just been the bigger thorn in my side. I guess I never truly believed that changing the chatter going on in my head could have such a big impact. But it has, I'm totally loving proving myself wrong for once!

So here it is people 5 Things I'm proud of this week. Don't forget to think about yours, you can even share them in the comments if you like!

Finally taking myself off to try a "hot" yoga class. I've been reading it can be beneficial if you have joint injuries and so far so good.
Enrolling in two more subjects for my Herbal Medicine course
Eating at home more than eating out
Taking The Beasts for a walk despite the torrential rain
Last but not least, jumping on the scales for my monthly weigh-in this morning. I've lost 0.4kg this month.

This last thing I'm proud of is one of the things I am most proud of ever. For the first time in my life, a small loss didn't send me in a downward spiral into the great black hole of despair. I was happy, pleased, proud. I didn't force these feelings, they just came. I can't begin to describe what an achievement this is for me, my normal, and not so long ago, reaction to losses like this has usually been pretty bleak. I guess this is what you'd call an NSV (Non-scale victory), for me it's the most humongous, amazing, supersonic victory ever. Yipppeeee!!!!!

It's feeling a little warm in here......

2009-04-29T16:20:00.005+10:00

Image:drinksmachine

"So hot in herre....."
Nelly

So I had grand plans to put together some of the reading I've been doing and hit you with a well researched, insightful and entertaining cholesterol post today, but somehow it just didn't happen. Despite that I will endeavor to entertain.

Today I took some niacin, number 3 of B vitamins, reported to have the ability to lower LDL and increase HDL cholesterol. I tend to be an all or nothing kind of girl and looked at the little bottle, read the recommended dose and decided to double it, based on, well, nothing really. So 200mg of nicotinic acid went down the hatch and I didn't really think anything more of it.

Twenty minutes later I was catching up on some of my favorite blogs and I noticed a tingle in my forearms and felt a little warm. A few minutes later I was tearing off my jumper to find my arms and hands were bright pink, my face started to tingle and I rushed to the mirror to see it turn into what I can only explain as the color of a beet before my very eyes. Then it hit me, ahhh this is the niacin flush I'd read about.

A rather strange experience that lasted about an hour, my whole body went red and I had a weird prickly tingling sensation all over, as well as a slight itch. Apparently niacin also promotes the release of histamine which is what causes this itch.

All in all a pretty interesting day of The Great Cholesterol Challenge. I think I might drop the dose tomorrow and see what happens, report to follow.

Have you had any strange experiences taking supplements? Have you had the niacin flush and lived to tell the tale? See you in the comments.

Just a small reminder to read my disclaimer over there on the right. Always remember to consult your medical practitioner before trying anything new.

Weight Loss Weekly

2009-04-27T18:18:00.002+10:00

Image: motleypixel

"Slow and steady finishes the race"
The Boyf

Weight Loss Weekly is an event where some other gals and I ask a question and answer it in our own styles each week.

This week Sunny asks:
"Right now, I'm focusing on losing some weight before our summer beach vacation (which means bathing suits and shorts EEK!!) which is 8 weeks away. When you're working hard towards a certain weight loss goal, what is your one unique secret weapon or trick that helps speed up your weight loss?"

Check out what the gals have to say.

Joie: "Secret weapons in the weight loss arsenal? Okay, I'll dish..." Read more at Joie de vivre: An amateur gourmet's guide.

Sunny: "Hmm, I think my most helpful secret weapon has to do with a delicious dessert that is actually not forbidden, not even when I’m trying to speed up my weight loss…" Keep reading at That Extra 20 Pounds

Nurit: "The last time I wore a bikini was 6 years ago when I was 4 months pregnant. We were in Hawaii. But I do have a little secret to share with you about wearing your bathing suit again. It all began 4 years ago…" Read more over at 1 Family Friendly Food

When I first read Sunny's question I thought "well this will be an easy post, short, a few words even" because I really don't have one. My attempts at speeding up weight loss have been sad sad affairs that usually last a whole 15min after my burst of motivation and planning. Or worse still they do work, and for a few weeks the weight flies off at an alarming rate only to congeal back around my thighs at an even more terrifying speed as soon as the momentum is lost and I can't maintain the deprivation or exercise regime any longer.

I'm trying more and more to look at weight loss as a very long term prospect. I've lost weight before, sometimes effortlessly and other times under strain and stress. Invariably I put it back on, my multisized wardrobe is a testament to this fact, as is my blog title.

So my answer to Sunny's question is simple. A sure fired way for me to speed up my weight loss, a trick, a secret weapon if you wish, is to stop caring so much. This doesn't mean I don't try, that I give up, sit on the couch surrounded by chips and chocolate and the occasional doughnut, rather it means I stop putting pressure on myself to achieve a certain weight goal by a certain date.

I've talked about how this is a curse for me here and I believe with all my heart that one of the keys to weight loss and maintenance for me lies in taking it slow, learning, adapting and finding my own healthy lifestyle groove.

This will mean that weight loss is speedy. If I graphed out all of my wonderful dieting years, the ups the downs, the plateaus and periods of nothingness it would be plain to see that my weight loss over time has been S.L.O.W. Well if you looked carefully at the data, you just might find, I haven't really lost any weight at all. Anything is faster than that.

Now this may not be something you could use in a pyramid selling scheme or sell e-books with, it isn't really even a concept you could design some over priced product on. But it is something you could try. It may not be for you, you may be one of those rare creatures that can put their head down and their glutes up and just do it. Or you may be like me, a little slower, but just as capable of getting there.

So do tell, are you more of a hare or a tortoise? Are you able to buckle down and get to it, shed the pounds and get on with life? Or are you taking your time? Do you have a secret weight loss weapon? Please do meet me in the comments for more chatter and thoughts.

5 Things I'm Proud Of #13

2009-04-23T22:14:00.004+10:00

Image: Maki_C30D

"From little things big things grow"
Paul Kelly

So these small things that I'm proud of, they happen every week and here they are again.

Working 5 days this week, the first time in a long time.
Reminding myself each and every day of what my goals are.
Belting out some tunes with the gals.
Picking up the extra weights at training and going hard.
Continuing to eat when I'm hungry.

What are the little things you've done this week that make you proud?

What is Cholesterol anyway?

2009-04-21T10:03:00.020+10:00

Image: Mr Jaded

"I've been reckless, but I'm not a rebel without a cause"
Angelina Jolie

This being week one of The Great Cholesterol Challenge I thought I'd have a look at what cholesterol actually is.

Who is Cholesterol and What Does He Do?

So there’s this group of lipids/fats in the body called sterols and cholesterol rolls with them. Cholesterol is like a pretty key gang member, he can be found anywhere at anytime, he’s part of our cell membranes, keeping things stable. It’s pretty important that our cell wall is kept good and strong, we need the goods to get in and out without any fuss and our buddy Cholesterol helps facilitate in his stylin smooth way.

Like I said Cholesterol is up in everywhere, he’s the main man, he helps make all kinds of hormones and bile salts, he even hangs out in the skin gettin some rays and makin some vitamin D for your enjoyment.

Cholesterol has got a bad rap for a while now but it’s not really his fault, like all good guys gone bad, it’s the dudes he hangs out with that are getting him into trouble.

The Other Guys

Let me introduce you to LDL. He’s a transporter, driving cholesterol around the body getting him into all sorts of trouble. Like everything in life nothing is cut and dried, LDL has a good heart and ultimately his intentions are good. He does want to help and does this by bringing Cholesterol to all the tissues in the body that need him to keep their thing going good. But he gets a bit wild sometimes and goes crazy, dropping our guy Cholesterol off all over the place, Cholesterol gets caught up in the chaos and together they start to cause the mayhem that we see as atherosclerosis.

Then we’ve got Triglyceride, he is part of the fat posse and well he’s kinda simple. He often just cruises in the blood with his transporter buddies and considers himself the storehouse, hoarding up the fat energy for when we might need it later. He’s just waiting patiently for his moment and then he really comes into his own. Triglyceride causes similar problems as LDL, together they rebel, party too much and get raucous, the neighbors call the cops with noise complaints and it gets messy.

The Girl

Lucky for Cholesterol he’s got a girl, and she keeps him in line most of the time. Her name is HDL and she’s smart and kind and she loves Cholesterol for what he truly is, an integral part of the body that we couldn’t live without. HDL has a sweet ride and she often picks Cholesterol up after he’s been hitting the sauce with his buddies. She drives him back to his Ma’s house at The Liver and together they sort him out. Sometimes he just rests and recoups at home, but most of the time he just has to get out. HDL and The Liver hook him up with the Bile Brothers and they sneak him out of the body via the back door.

So there you have it, part of Cholesterol’s story, it’s long and takes many twists and turns and like any complicated guy, mysterious and intriguing but ultimatly confusing.

Want to know more? Got questions? Please do ask.

Watch this space for the next instalment where we’ll look at how to interpret your test results and what all those numbers mean for you and your body.

Weight Loss Weekly

2009-04-20T10:20:00.000+10:00

"Always be a first-rate version of yourself, instead of a second-rate version of somebody else"
Judy Garland

Weight Loss Weekly is a collaborative blogging effort between the fantabulous Joie, Sunny, Nurit and myself. We each take turns asking a question and each week we answer these questions on our blogs. I've been handed the baton by Giyen over at her inspirational blog, baconismyenemy.

This week Joie asks:

"How do your family and friends support you or hinder you in your weight loss efforts? Do they adapt easily to your changing habits and help you along, or do they confront your new habits with skepticism?"

Here's a taste of what the girls had to say this week:

Joie: "The place? Applebees. The dessert? Cheesecake shooter...eew. After a bite, I put my fork down not wanting to waste the calories. My friends (well, not so much anymore) look over at me and sneer, "Oh, is this the new thing you're doing now?" Fortunately, the comment makes me think about our friendship rather than my weight loss goals and efforts, but there is always that nagging doubt..." read more at Joie de vivre: An amateur gourmet's guide.

Sunny: "My husband has been really good. Like when I was first trying to change my eating habits and was cranky and starving, ready to give up and chow down on a whole bag of potato chips..." keep reading at www.ThatExtra20Pounds.blogspot.com

Nurit: Nurit has some serious blogging commitments this week and is having a break from WLW. She is taking part in Hunger Action Week and is sure to be posting some fantastic ways to spend less on food but still enjoy delicious meals, be sure to visit her at 1 family. friendly. food.

I think the most amazing way in which my friends and family support me is by loving me no matter what. I can be in "crazed diet" mode or in "don't give a stuff" mode and they just accept me for me, and carry on being the best family and friends a girl could ask for.

Ways in which I feel supported besides the love include:

The Folks always ask, before I come to visit, if there are any special foods I'd like them to buy, never once have they criticized or laughed at my crazy diet attempts, whether it be low carb, low fat or juicing. They often get on the band wagon and join in.

The Soul Sistah has ears of gold, she has listened to me whine and rant about my weight and insecurities for nigh on 20 years now, she never wavers, listening and nodding. She gives advice and pulls me into line when I'm being indulgent or drowning in a pool of self pity.

The Posse, my wonderful friends, most of whom I've known since I was a kid, share delicious meals with me, laugh with me, exercise with me and are always encouraging. Many of them read this blog and even comment sometimes. Best of all each and everyone of them make me smile in their own special way and that is reason enough to be the best version of me I can be.

Last but not least, The Boyf, the person who has probably endured the most torture of all. He adapts his incredible cooking skills to whatever latest idea I've got going, has joined me on detoxes, held my hand when I've cried, been as disappointed as me when the scale hasn't budged, walked with me, talked with me and always been the most encouraging and supportive person in my life.

Reading over this I feel a renewed sense of determination. I have such beautiful people in my life, and I want to live my most bestest life with them for as long as I can.

How about you? Do you have a super support team? Or are you a lone wolf?

5 Things I'm Proud Of #12

2009-04-18T14:52:00.008+10:00

Image: john w

"Follow effective action with quiet reflection. From the quiet reflection will come even more effective action"
Peter F Ducker

I'm running a bit late this week, but better late than never. Remember to focus on the little things, it is those little things that make up the big things we are reaching for.

Letting myself have a nap rather than reach for the coffee
Commencing the epic task that is tidying up the disaster zone that is our house
Dragging myself onto the Wonderfully Fandangled Exercise Machine and getting that cardio DONE
Publicly broadcasting The Great Cholesterol Challenge. Nothing like potential humiliation to get me going
Booking tickets to Japan..... yippeeee!!

Have you got any moments you are proud of this week?

The Great Cholesterol Challenge

2009-04-14T17:18:00.003+10:00

So it seems my cholesterol is on the higher side of normal and my Dear Dr would like me to get the numbers looking a bit better. Huh…cholesterol? Isn’t that something old people complain about, having to eat rabbit food and take pills? Apparently not.

Here’s how I’m looking at the moment (all results in mmol/L)
Chol: 5.8
Trigs: 1.6
HDL: 1.3
LDL: 3.8

The Doc has given me 6 weeks to make a difference on them there numbers, and I’m taking her up on it. I love nothing more than a good challenge and having such a measurable result is really something to get excited about, dorky I know.

The goal is to reduce LDL and increase HDL, and get my total cholesterol down as well. To spur me on and keep the challenge at the front of my mind, I’ve set myself a little blogging task. For the next 6 weeks, once a week, for your viewing pleasure, I will be providing some scintillating reading on cholesterol, what it is, how to manage it, controversy surrounding it and anything else I stumble across on the way.

If you feel I’m missing something or there is a burning question you have about cholesterol fire away and I’ll do my best to answer it.

If you’re really brave, join me. You can email me at yoyonomore(at)gmail(dot)com or comment right here. I’d love some support along the way. Do you have high cholesterol? Want some crazy Aussie gal to cheer you on for the next 6 weeks and surprise your Dr with the results? Not sure? Get a test and lets get going, we've got arteries to rescue.

Weight Loss Weekly

2009-04-13T12:15:00.007+10:00

Image: pasotraspaso

"We work in the dark-we do what we can-we give what we have. Our doubt is our passion, and our passion is out task. The rest is the madness of art"
Henry James

Welcome once again to Weight Loss Weekly, a collaborative blogging effort between Joie, Sunny, Nurit and myself. Each week one of us asks a question related to weight loss and we all post our thoughts. This week was my turn, and this is what I had to ask the girls.....

You've got a big event coming up, and your still not at a "happy weight", how do you combat those feelings of self doubt and have a good time without getting caught up in the "I'm so fat, I look so bad" crazy talk running around in your head?

This is a tricky one for me, something I have yet to conquer. It's a battle from the moment I find out about an upcoming event or occasion, I instantly calculate how much weight I could lose between now and then.

It's obsessive, it's unhealthy and it's bloody boring.

I have been fighting this very situation for the last few weeks, anticipating the the wedding of my dearest darling friend K Anne, in which I was part of the bridal party. This is why I suggested the question to my fellow Weight Loss Weekly bloggers. I need help with this one.

K Anne had a fabulous wedding, and I had a ball, all I can say is thank the Gods for control top underwear and champagne.

It's really the time leading up to the event that's most fraught with self doubt and the much loved crazy talk that I need help with. The shopping trip to find the outfit, torturous and panic stricken. I seem to be in this no-mans land of sizes, just too small for the plus sizes and way out of range for the sizes deemed "normal". While I'm on that topic, what's up with plus sized formal wear, who designs that stuff? Why, just because you are of the wider thighs, would any woman want to be seen frolicking around in the elasticized waisted, sequined soaked , batwing sleeved creations that seem to dominate the racks? Why I ask you, why?

Moving on to the crucial weeks preceding the big day, the ones when I should be on the latest "Hollywood" diet, one that has broiled chicken breast featured quite heavily and a few steamed veges tossed in for effect. I should also probably be getting acquainted with my local beauty salon, getting some stinky seaweed body wrap type treatments that promise to melt away the inches. Do I do this? No. It seems I don't have this celebrityesque type determination nor vision, I carry on meandering around with no sense of urgency spurring me on.

Finally it gets to peak preparation time and I go back to my calculations of miraculous weight loss and find I am in much the same state as before. I panic, freak-out, break down and start to lose myself in my own head.

Now all of this definitely went on leading up to my darling K Anne's big wedding day. Finally the day came and I arrived, caught up with old friends and K's adorable family and the feelings of craziness ebbed away. I still tried to stuff myself into two pairs of control top underwear in a last minute attempt to appear svelte, and I still teetered on the brink of self loathing but I must say I held up OK.

You see the thing I realised as I walked down the aisle clutching my bouquet, holding back the tears, is that there are much better and bigger things to be thinking about in life, and most people are thinking them. No one was looking at me, pointing and thinking "oooh she looks fat" as I feared. Most people in that chapel where waiting for K to walk through the doors in all her bridal splendor, some people were thinking, "My baby girl is getting married", others were thinking "My son has met the girl of his dreams" and a few, perhaps even my own wonderful Boyf, were thinking "hmmmm I wonder what the food will be like".

As I sat at the bridal table, listening to the speeches, and watched my oldest friend look into her husbands eyes, I silenced that voice in my head, and reminded myself, that this was my life, right now, this was to be one of my treasured memories, and I wanted to remember it for what it was.

Am I cured of the crazy talk? Am I to never ponder my appearance again, live in a Zen like state of empty vesselness? I doubt it, but I will try to be less fearful and more positive, and if all else fails, I will always wear ridiculous shoes, because concentrating on not falling over is a great way to keep my mind still.

Now over to my girls and their wise words....

Sunny: The problem for me isn't so much that I can't have a good time because I'm so worried about how I look. The hardest part is actually before... when I'm trying to pick out what to wear! Keep reading at www.ThatExtra20Pounds.blogspot.com

Nurit: Every time I need to dress up before date night, get out of my usual T-shirt and jeans and put on something nicer looking, I find that I have nothing to wear. Sound familiar? Read more on 1 family. friendly. food.

Joie: Fortunately, I have always had pretty healthy self-esteem. Unfortunately, this is probably why I allowed myself to gain so much weight!" Read more at Joie de vivre: An amateur gourmet's guide

And you? Any tips or thoughts? Any sure fired cures to the crazy talk? Are you too plagued by the pre-event blues? Comment away, I'll be there listening and learning.

5 Things I'm Proud of #11

2009-04-09T22:09:00.006+10:00

Image: mdezemery

"All that we are is a result of what we have thought. The mind is everything. What we think we become"
Buddha

I'm finding more and more that the whole positive thinking thing really does work. Things just seem to flow on from each other and while life itself often doesn't change all that much, the way we look at it can make all the difference. So here I am again making this list of the little things that I'm proud of this week.

Making every meal a home cooked one this week
Keeping up the walking and the thinking
Making time to catch up with old friends
Reacquainting myself with myself and eating when I'm hungry
Joining the girls for Weight Loss Weekly, what fun!

What are you proud of this week? Be it big or small be proud of them all.

5 Reasons You Should Eat More Fish

2009-04-08T12:12:00.013+10:00

Image:Reavel

"Chance is always powerful. Let your hook always be cast; in the pool where you least expect it, there will be fish"
Ovid

I have a new found love of fish, having grown up hating it with a passion, it was difficult for The Boy to get me interested, but he eventually succeeded. I now proudly get it, the flavor, the texture the freshness. I'll eat it raw, dried, fried, grilled, poached you name it, the only problem is, I forget. Maybe it's because it's not part of my hardwired food repertoire, maybe because it's not as easy to get as a chicken breast or a lamb chop. Whatever the excuse, it's time to get over it and start getting into it, and here's why:

Consumption of fish reduces the risk of cardiovascular disease, heart attack and stroke.
Eating fish regularly has shown to reduce inflammation.
Essential fatty acids found in fish improve cholesterol levels, decreasing triglycerides and increasing HDL (the good cholesterol)
The addition of fish to your diet could assist in weight loss and blood sugar control
It's been shown that eating fish on a weekly basis reduces the risk of Alzheimer's disease

Most of the studies done on the benefits of fish in the diet relate to the consumption of Omega 3 fatty acids. These fats are found in highest amounts in certain fish such as:

Herring
Mackerel
Salmon
Tuna
Anchovies
Sardines

Sustainable fishing techniques as well as endangered species may be things you want to take in to consideration when buying fish. Check out the Australian Marine Conservation Society for more info. This article also gives you a good snap shot at types of fishing and what species to avoid. Passionfish is an organisation based in the US, committed to providing up to date information on sustainable fishing and aquaculture. They have a great blog over at Ocean Commotion with more news and happenings.

Last but not least there has been much concern about the inadvertent consumption of mercury when eating fish, especially for pregnant women. The Food Standards Australia and New Zealand suggest eating 2-3 serves of most types of fish per week as safe.

Certain species of fish tend to have higher levels of mercury due to their position in the food chain, size and age, and should be eaten less frequently. It is suggest that the following fish should only be eaten once a week, and if consumed, no other fish should be eaten that week.

Shark/Flake
Orange Roughy- Deep Sea Perch/Sea Perch (identified as an over fished species)
Billfish- swordfish, marlin and broadbill (identified as an over fished species)
Catfish

So there you have it, why to eat fish and some issues that might be of interest when you are standing at the fish market wondering what to get.

How do you enjoy fish on a regular basis? Do you love it/hate it? Any good recipes? Please do share in the comments.......

An Update of Sorts

2009-04-08T08:32:00.004+10:00

Image: Cowboy Dave

Accountability is said to be one of the corner stones of weight loss. I'm all about having corner stones, especially if it means I'll be happily strolling down the beach in my swimmers this summer, rather than wrapped up in a towel lying on the sand, as low profile as possible so as to avoid freaking the kids out.

So with that in mind, I thought I better fill you in on my C25K progress and my abandoning of the Push Up Challenge.

I was so super keen to start the Couch to 5K, even teamed up with a buddy, but didn't get any further than the first training session. It's the long standing thorn in my side that's holding me back from this one; The Dodgy Knee. Turns out, after finding a super cool physiotherapist, I have an old injury to my meniscus which has resolved but left some scar tissue around the knee joint. As well as that my quads have lost a lot of strength and my knee cap isn't gliding the way it should be.

After some pretty hellish massage and really exciting knee exercises, the Physio suggested I try running again. I, with the enthusiasm of a puppy, raced out to the park and did as she said. For 10 min, on nice soft grass, with no hills, I felt the wind in my hair and imagined what outfit I would wear at my first race. Then the pain hit, slowly at first, but increased over the days. Turns out my knee is not up to it yet, and I'm totally bummed. So fear not, I am not a slacker, I have the best of intentions, and the C25K is still on my list.

Funny I should mention slack, because that's exactly how I would describe my efforts at the push up challenge. Oh so much fervor at first, so proud of my developing form and progress.... then what happened? I met up with the excuse making machine: "oh my arms are too sore today" "I'm not getting anywhere, maybe I need a rest" "It's too hard" blah blah blah blah

Need I say more? Well last night at training session number 3 we did push ups and I was astounded at myself, I managed 10 without much trouble at all (yes the girly on you knees ones, let's not get carried away with the imagery here). I couldn't have done this without my attempts at the 100 push ups, so maybe it wasn't time wasted after all, maybe it's time to return, maybe even today?

Speaking of training, The Terrier has handed over the reins to one of her much trusted employees, apparently we are the best group to work with due to our crude jokes, constant laughter, singing of Eye of the Tiger and high fiving of each other. So we now have The Kelpie as our devoted trainer and he is, as The Terrier put it, quite easy on the eye.

So there you have it. Everything accounted for, so like, that's the accountability thing done..... I wonder if I've lost any weight yet?????

"Good taste is the excuse I've always given for leading such a bad life"
Oscar Wilde

Weight Loss Weekly

2009-04-06T17:57:00.001+10:00

Have you been reading the fabulous collaborative blog post by Joie, Sunny, Nurit and previously Giyen? Well you are about to, because the girls have asked me to join them. Weight Loss Weekly is, as the name suggests, a weekly occurrence and delves into the world of weight loss from 4 different perspectives. We each take turns asking a question and all answer suggested question. I've loved reading the different view points and approaches each week and am pretty darn excited to be part of it, I hope you like it.

This week Nurit from Family Friendly Food asks:

You’re trying to lose weight and eat good food, but there is a type of food or drink that you love so much. It could be junk food, it could be loaded with calories but you just got to have it. You might be able to avoid it in the short-term for the sake of your diet, but not all your life. It’s your weak-spot-food. What is it and why do you love it or crave it so much? And what do you do about it?

Be sure to check out the other posts on this topic, here's what the girls have to say

Nurit: “There are a few weak spots for me, but I can narrow it down to two, heavy cream and baked goods. Since I can remember myself, I was fascinated by heavy cream... Read more at 1 family. friendly. food.

Sunny: "I'm still not sure the right way to deal with all my favorite bad-for-you foods. Should I limit myself to eating some of my favorite things only 1 day a week? Like an "eat whatever you want day"?" keep reading at www.ThatExtra20Pounds.blogspot.com

Joie: "Weaknesses? Yeah, I can name a few dozen. Weaknesses can be shored up, however the irrational frenzy I feel when around a pepperoni pizza is another thing entirely!" read more at Joie de vivre: An amateur gourmet's guide

Now, *ahem*, my turn.......

In this, my attempt at weight loss #982 736 001, I am determined to succeed like never before. Gone are the days of fad diets, restrictive food lists, obsessive weighing and the torturous feelings of deprivation and despair. So with that in mind there really are no foods that are completely off limits to me. I am trying to exercise moderation in all things.

Having said that, there is one thing that I dream about, one dish that I could eat at any time anywhere. It's light and flaky the perfect balance of sweet and savory, definitely not a diet food and makes my heart soar with joy and desire even at the slightest mention.

Let me introduce you to the almighty, the supreme, the incomparable....... Roti Canai.

Image: Nicole Lee

I love Roti because it's like a ghee infused pastry, comes with curry, is eaten with your hands and is made like this. I first discovered it on my travels around Malaysia, we ordered it randomly and felt as if we had been given the answer to the meaning of life, such is the power of The Roti.

I've found a few places back home that do roti justice, but there really is no comparison to the real deal, the smells the sounds, the hot out of the hands of the roti master onto your plate and swiftly into your mouth, all washed down with some limau ais or teh tarik *drool*

So how do I manage my roti love while trying to lose weight? Well I don't eat it for breakfast everyday that's for sure. When I do eat it, I enjoy, savor and delight in each and every mouthful, it's food for my soul. I'm learning that I don't need that experience everyday, it's almost better to have it on rare occasions, when the stars align and I can sit with the universe and just be, me and my roti.

What about you? What food do you dream of? Is it a hindrance to your weight loss that you just can't live without? Or are you waiting patiently for the day you can indulge again? Comment away........

"There is a theory which states that if ever anybody discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable. There is another theory which states that this has already happened"
Douglas Adams

The Don't Go Hungry Diet

2009-04-04T21:54:00.001+11:00

Image: fab4chiky

Update: Hi to everyone who's come on over from Dr Amanda's newsletter, welcome to my blog, take a look around, stay for a chat, there's lots of fun to be had, as well as support and info on weight loss and healthy living. For my latest update on The Don't Go Hungry Diet have a look over here.

Dr Amanda Sainsbury-Salis has a story we can all relate to. As a healthy vibrant teen she thinks she could do with losing a few kilos and takes her first ride on the diet funship. As the years pass by her weight steadily increases until she can take it no longer.

So what does she do? Does she throw herself headlong into a binge that will surpass all binges? Does she join the gym? Start another diet, the one that promises she'll lose 20kgs in one month? Does she give-up and think well nothing works, why bother? No she does not. This is where Dr Amanda's story gets really interesting, she decides to start a career in medical research, so she can really, really understand what is going on with her body.

What follows in her tale is a close to 30kg (66 lbs) weight loss that she has kept off with ease and joy for 9 years. Not to mention an enviable career as a weight regulation expert, researcher, lecturer and author of the fabulous book The Don't Go Hungry Diet

Last week I had the pleasure of attending one of Dr Amanda's advanced weight loss workshop's. Amanda is extremely positive and encouraging, she brings alive the overwhelmingly large body of research that is being done on weight management. One of the most compelling little factoids that I came away with was that:

The average weight loss experienced by participants of clinical trials, with support, scientifically designed diets and exercise programs, is 12kgs (26.4 lbs) per year.

This amazes me. So many times I've given up, feeling like a failure because I've only lost a couple of hundred grams, when all along this has been a healthy sustainable weight loss. These figures rock my world! Sure you can lose weight faster, other factors, such as motivation, consistency, exercise, all play a part, but the bottom line is Biggest Loser style loss is near impossible to replicate, even in controlled studies.

The joy of Dr Amanda's research and the way she presents it, both in her book and during her workshop, is that it's simple. It does not rely on counting points or calories or excluding any food groups, and is all about getting back in touch with the wisdom of our own bodies, they know what they are doing people, all we have to do is pay attention.

The two main concepts in The Don't Go Hungry Diet are the Famine Reaction and the Fat Brake.

The Famine Reaction
The famine reaction is the body's way of protecting us from life threatening weight loss. It's what we encounter when we reach that much beloved state, the plateau. We get HUNGRY beyond belief and we stop losing weight. Some of us push through, being more restrictive and deprived, others give in to our body's survival instincts and we eat and eat and eat and gain that weight right back. Neither response usually results in healthy sustainable weight loss.

The Fat Brake
The fat brake is the body's way of protecting us from life threatening weight gain. It increases our metabolism and decreases our appetite in an attempt to regulate our weight and get us back to the weight most suited to our body. You might have felt, after all the holiday indulgences, that you just aren't as hungry as usual, or you feel a bit restless and want to get moving. That's your body saying..... wooooah nelly, that roast chicken with gravy, that pudding with cream, that chocolate for breakfast and that glass *cough* or two of wine was waaaaay to much, put on the fat brake lady time to get lean.

So what do we do to use these natural weight managers we have sitting inside us, trying so desperately to do what they can to keep us lean and healthy?

Listen.

Deep down inside, behind what the peddlers of the diet machine have convinced you of, your body is saying something, and it may be the most important thing you will ever hear.

Eat when you are hungry, until you are satisfied, not left wanting, not overstuffed, satisfied. It's that simple. The tricky thing is getting back in touch with that old friend, hunger. After years and years of dieting, I've found that feeling of hunger as well as satiety quite elusive. But it is a work in progress and what better thing to strive for than to be able to eat when I'm hungry!!

I could go on and on and on about the research and the implications, but I'll leave that to the book, it couldn't be said better.

If you want to get off the rollercoaster, give up on the yo-yo, stop counting points and calories, and get back to living life in harmony with your body, this may be for you. I'm in. It sits pretty well with my current plan and I want to trust myself, to know that no matter what the situation I can rely on me, and it will all be alright.

You can read more about Dr Amanda, her story, the book and her coaching sessions here.

Any thoughts? Got all this worked out already? Questions? Fire away below in the comments.

"Free your mind and your ass will follow"
George Clinton, Funkadelic

5 Things I'm Proud of #10

2009-04-03T09:22:00.003+11:00

I can't believe I've had 10 "5 Things I'm Proud of". That's 50 things I've been consciously proud of this year, it's a funny concept, a big change. I'm so used to always listing the negatives, what a difference a shift in focus makes. Last night I had a lapse, caught a reflection of myself in the mirror zoned in on my thighs and started down the path of doom of gloom. But I stopped before the words escaped. There's power in this being proud thing, so onwards......

1. Sticking at these lists, it's working, and life is looking a hell of a lot better for it.

2. Not bailing on The Terrier or Team Absolute Abs, despite the torrential rain

3. Walking, walking , walking which really helps the thinking, thinking, thinking.

4. Continuing to eat slowly, and maybe even getting a little better at it.

5. Officially being part of the D-man's life, I hope I can teach him half as much as what I'm sure he'll teach me.

"Bart, having never received any words of encouragement myself, I'm not sure how they're supposed to sound. But here goes: I believe in you."
Lisa Simpson

Finally, movement

2009-03-31T10:32:00.007+11:00

Image: Ti H20

It's happened people, the number has moved, there must be something in this eating slower thing because I got on the scale this morning for my monthly weigh-in and I'd lost 2kg (4.4lbs) Yippeeee!! I'm trying not to make a big deal of this, trying to remember all my pledges to not get caught up in the numbers, but it's still a pretty sweet feeling to see that number getting smaller. So I deemed it time for an update of the numbers and here they are.

Starting point 13/11/08
Weight: 109.9kg
Bust: 115cm
Upper Arm: 36cm
Waist #1 (narrowest part): 95cm
Waist #2 (at belly button): 114cm
Hips: 127cm
Upper Thigh: 76cm
Knee: 49cm
Calf: 46cm

Today 31/03/09
Weight: 105.6kg
Bust: 109cm
Upper Arm: 34cm
Waist #1: 89cm
Waist #2: 104cm
Hips: 120cm
Upper Thigh: 71cm
Knee: 45cm
Calf: 44.5cm

"I'm pretty sure there's a lot more to life than being really, really, ridiculously good looking"
Derek Zoolander

Tea for two

2009-03-29T21:21:00.005+11:00

I decided it's all about having yummy things at home to keep me satisfied and entertained. Tonight I indulged my love of iced tea. The whole iced tea experience really hit me on my travels through South East Asia. Each country I visited had it's own style involving some kind of black tea, limes or lemons, ice and a healthy dose of sugar syrup. Don't even get me started on the iced coffees with sweetened condensed milk, oh and the pearl teas of Taiwan...... ahhh beverage heaven.

This one was pretty easy to make and is a great distraction when you're pacing the kitchen looking for something, anything.

Ingredients
1 tea bag
Juice of one lemon
1 teaspoon of honey
Fresh Mint leaves
Water

Steep the tea bag in 1/2 cup of boiling water until desired strength is achieved.
Add the lemon juice and honey, stir until honey dissolves.
Top up with cold water.
Add mint leaves- I find adding the fresh mint once the cold water is added prevents many of the tannins being released and keeps the tea tasting fresh and minty.
Add ice if desired and serve.

For this brew I used Manuka honey, which has strong antimicrobial and anti-inflammatory properties as well as being a great adjunct treatment of Helicobacter pylori. I don't bother straining the mint leaves, and usually chew on them as I drink the tea. Mint is great for digestion and soothes and relaxes the colon, being a great aid in alleviating IBS symptoms as well as nausea and vomiting.

There is much talk of the health benefits of green tea and it can be easily substitued for a milder flavor. Black tea, however, also has a myriad of health benefits including reduced risk of cardiovascular disease and lowering cholesterol absorption. Black tea also contains high levels of antioxidants.

I had a go at baking these delish yet healthy treats, and they turned out really well. Tea and cakeish type things, I'm feeling pretty stocked up for the week, prepared, ready to face the world.

"If man has no tea in him, he is incapable of understanding truth and beauty"
Japanese proverb

5 Things I'm Proud Of #9

2009-03-27T10:31:00.007+11:00

Image: harold.lloyd (well I declare)'s

Hmmmm, Friday came around awfully quick this week. Was there even time to be proud?

Meeting with The Terrier for the first time, she's small, she's muscly, she's energetic and she sure doesn't take no for an answer. My thighs thank her in some strange sadistic way.
Doing a 10min jog today. The physiotherapist advised 'testing' my knee out to see if we've made any improvements. I could have easily not done this, but I did, I'm impressed, and keeping my fingers crossed.
Recognizing that somedays it's OK to just let yourself feel a bit sad and bliss out in front of a movie, rather than push through it.
Keeping at the eating slow thing, it's harder than it looks, and sometimes I totally forget until I have one mouthful left, but as the wonderful Ms Netherlands says, I'm trying, and that's what counts.
Stepping out of my comfort zone. I won't bore you with the details but let's just say, it involved me, a receptionist and a lost appointment time. I stayed true to my niceness, but I ain't getting pushed around no more no more no more.

"Jogging is very beneficial. It's good for your legs and your feet. It's also very good for the ground. It makes it feel needed"
Charles Schulz

Exercise update

2009-03-25T14:31:00.004+11:00

Image: Diego Cupolo

You know that road I talked about yesterday? Well it might be time to start running on it again. Over there somewhere on the right in the About Me section I talk about good health professionals being worth their weight in gold. Well I think my physiotherapist is well worth that and maybe even more, she's tiny.

After some truly agonizing massage and not so exciting exercises, she thinks it's time for me to start jogging again, slowly. I'm all about the slowly.

I'm excited, nervous and a little bit like fantasizing about my long lost running career. Ha! Well more like hoping that I can include some regular laps around the park in the Wonderful Workout Experiment. Here's hoping.

More news on the exercise front. The girls and I met up with our personal trainer last night. She's like a little terrier, a total ball breaker, and I love it! When she left we were like " yeah bye yeah we feel great, thankssomuch, see you next week" smiles and waves. As soon as she got out of sight we collapsed to the grass and discussed how at various points during the session we had all thought we may pass out/vomit from the exhertion. All in all an excellent first meeting.

"Fitness to me isn't about a crunch or a push up, it's about taking your power back"
Jillian Michaels

Musings, or random stuff from in my head........

2009-03-24T13:32:00.009+11:00

Image: Jasmic

I realised things were changing, when last night I found myself tucked up in bed flicking through Women's Strength Training Anatomy by Frederic Delavier. Here I was, me, lying in bed after making myself do my cardio and arm work-out, reading a book about exercise. Can you believe it?

At times this road seems very long and even monotonous, the same scenery goes by day after day and my destination seems not to get any closer. The scale is moving very, very, VERY slowly, some days I wonder if my engine is even switched on, maybe I am 5 years old again, sitting in my Dad's truck pretending to be careening down the highway at full speed, but in reality I am sitting in the driveway with the door open and my dog asleep on the ground below.

But I am getting somewhere. Picture it, me, this time last year, night shift, food as a way to stay awake, no exercise except walking the corridors like a zombie doing my rounds. When I think of this I can see the wheels are turning, I am moving forward.

There are so many ways to measure weight loss, many of them have nothing to do with actual weight lost. In the last few months I feel like I have found so many new ways to travel on this road, sometimes I gain speed and turn a corner, feel the wind in my hair, and other days I stop and rest under a tree, have a little snack, a snooze, and watch everyone else zoom on by.

The best bit about being where I am on the road right now is that I'm on the road. I'm not planning the road, thinking about the road, ignoring the road, I'm here standing in the sun, looking ahead at the twists and turns to come and back at the mountains and hill's I've climbed, and it is here I realise I've made it to my destination, the place I'm meant to be.

"All journey's have secret destinations of which the traveler is not aware"
Martin Buber

5 Things I'm Proud Of #8

2009-03-20T10:14:00.005+11:00

Image: davesag

I've been doing this exercise for a while now. Today I realised, it doesn't make me feel icky anymore. Gone are the feelings of "being proud of yourself? That's just lame, you're not worth being proud of." The five things come easily and without much effort. Could it be? Could it be that I'm starting to see myself in a different light? In a soft appropriate light, nothing like the harsh, unwanted, shadow inducing beams of a Kmart change room of old?

Comment if you will, share if you like, but most of all remember what you've done that makes you proud.

Finally doing my exams. Distance Ed can be such a struggle, all part of learning how to be self motivated

Doing the exercises my new fabulous physio has given me for my dodgy knee, I will run again, I will run again, I will run again.... well jog... well maybe it's just walking really fast....

Trying out some HTML, with help from Roni at SkinnyMiniMedia. It seems so scary, but really not so

Eating S.L.O.W.L.Y I'm amazed at how slow I can eat and what a difference it makes to portions. Hmmm maybe another key unlocking another door

Saying YES to sharing a personal trainer with the gorgeous JRose and friends, as much as I love my solo fitness efforts, having a group to be accountable to is going to really up the ante

"You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection"
Buddha

The Plan

2009-03-17T18:11:00.013+11:00

Photo: k.Akagami

For someone with such a free form existence I certainly love structure, and it seems that structure loves me. Setting up a routine with my exercise has really paid off. I'm now doing 30min of cardio every day with the regularity of a timepiece. Now that I have worked out a schedule for my resistance exercise I'm in a state of elation as I complete each task according to plan.

There is just that little matter of food. I mentally did an assessment of what I eat today and it's not so bad, lot's of antioxidants, good protein sources, not too much processed crap. The problem is I eat way way way too much. I eat like I am on the brink of an apocalypse, I eat to keep myself entertained, I eat as a procrastination, I eat, I eat I eat.

Part of this problem is the fact that I eat at the speed of light, I am the Superwoman of eating. I could easily make a three course meal disappear in the time it would take a "normal" person to begin to contemplate their entree. There they would be savoring the smells and presentation and I'd be there tapping my fingers thinking "hmmmm I wonder if that great dessert place is open down the road".

Now any dieter worth their weight in Cadbury Creme Eggs knows that over eating and eating too fast is a combination that equals weight gain like no other. I think part of the problem is not having a clear picture in my mind of what I should and could be doing to get that scale edging in the right direction.

My usual attempt at a solution goes like this:
Hmmm I eat too much, I'm going to eat less.
Hmmm I eat too fast, I'm going to eat slower.

I was sitting there thinking these exact thoughts today when I realised something seemed very familiar, I'd been down this road many times before and where had it got me? Here. I had a long hard look at here in the mirror and realised it's not where I want to be. I want to be there, in the land of no back fat, slender thighs and shapely arms. I want to be over there, where looking in the mirror isn't quiet so painful.

So I have devised a plan. Like my new exercise routine, I am going to start slow, be accountable and be consistent. This is my plan, it is long, overly detailed, and probably totally boring for you, but this is part of being accountable, now you know what I'm doing. For all those who know and eat with me in the real world feel free to pull me up if you see me with the crazy eyes, inhaling plates of food like a tornado let free.

To combat eating too fast I am going to eat slower, to do this I am going to:

Chew each mouthful until I have munched recognisable food bits into oblivion.

Pause after swallowing and take two deep relaxing breaths.

Not reload my fork until steps 1 and 2 have been executed.

To combat eating too much I am going to eat less, to do this I am going to:

Observe above guidelines and ask myself after each mouthful if I am still hungry

When I stop being hungry I will:
a. If out, get up, go to the bathroom, wash my hands, look at myself in the mirror and tell myslef I am finished.
b. If I am at home, take my plate into the kitchen and wash it up. I will not sneak extra bits while I am there.

If eating out and sharing a variety of dishes, predetermine portions before they arrive at the table and eat accordingly, remembering to continue to abide by above guidelines.

There it is, you've seen it, I've seen it, time to do it. Any suggestions would be muchly appreciated. Watch this space for a report in the coming weeks.

"Innovation is not the product of logical thought, although the result is tied to logical structure"
Albert Einstein

*Note: Much love to Roni at SkinnyMiniMedia for her posts on HTML for beginners I made headings and lists, yippeee!

Weekend Adventures

2009-03-14T15:43:00.004+11:00

While I stayed at home studying, The Ninja went out on a food adventure, returning with hand made delights from a local butcher that has been smoking and curing meats on site for 25yrs.

We sat down to an afternoon treat of fried speck, hot salami and some fabulous cheeses, not to mention a little *cough* glass of Lambrusco to wash it down. It was so delicious we were lost for words. It reminded me of the stark contrast that dieting is and further set my resolve to never ever diet again.

I've been inspired by Joie, Nurit and Sunny and their amazing culinary feats while losing weight, and thought it was high time I connected with the kitchen and got my creative on.

Maybe there will be some recipes to come.... maybe just straight up food pr0n, who knows.........
Happy weekend people, may you relax and rejoice.

"What garlic is to food, insanity is to art"
Augustus Saint-Gaudens

5 Things I'm Proud of #8

2009-03-13T10:36:00.005+11:00

Photo: Elfleda

I'm not sure if it was the full moon or all the kim chee I ate last night, but I had some very strange dreams, resulting in me feeling a bit like a zombie this morning. I tried some old shorts on in the hope that them falling off me would make me feel a bit more awake, bit alas, they still fit. I couldn't help but have a little "Are we there yet? Are we there yet?" moment. I guess slow and steady wins the race right? Right? Right??

Despite the zombie like state of being and the lack of items of clothing miraculously falling to the ground, I'm still proud of a few things this week. How bout you?

1. Taking MizFit and Kelly O's advice and mixing it up to avoid a work-out plateau. It's amazing, I didn't even realise how automatic my cardio had become. Feeling sore and exhausted again yippeee!

2. Keeping on keeping on with the exercise despite my journey into food chaos, with a stop-over in binge land.

3. Realising that just by letting it happen, I've created exactly what I wanted in my life for maybe the first time ever.

4. Having absolutley no regrets about leaving my hard earned career behind me- I thought there might be a tinge of nostalgia by now..... nup!

5. Having the first meeting of the gals for our little sing-a-thons, new people, new ideas, new sounds.

"Genius is eternal patience"
Michelangelo

Totally unrelated post

2009-03-10T16:04:00.003+11:00

We interrupt the usual broadcast of weight loss whining to share a little idea found out there in internet land that could make a big difference.

Tim Ferriss wrote an inspirational book, The Four Hour Work Week and continues to inspire with his living outside the square approach. His latest project is raising money for DonorsChoose.org. A US not-for-profit raising much needed money for resources in the US public school system.

What Tim is offering is $3 donated to DonorsChoose.org for every new follower he gets on twitter in the next 2 weeks. Check out his post for more details. Follow Tim on twitter and let's see what happens.

"Education is the most powerful weapon you can use to change the world"
Nelson Mandela

Forward then back

2009-03-09T18:09:00.002+11:00

Photo: tanakawho

Things have been sliding a bit here in Yo-yo no more land. Not for any particular reason, I have no real excuse. I guess it's just the natural up and down of things. I remember a teacher of mine talking about life. He described life not as a straight line from one place to the next, but as a continuous spiral. It's really the two steps forward one step back principle. The concept that life does not flow always in one direction, we are constantly moving forward and backward and forward again. I'm in a backward phase right now, but the good thing is that soon there will be a forward stage, if my teacher's theory is right.

I wonder how people keep on track? How do you keep your goals in the forefront of your mind and not let the chaos of life drown out what you are trying to do? I wonder?

"I find hope in the darkest of days, and focus in the brightest, I do not judge the universe"
Dalai Lama

5 Things I'm Proud Of # 7

2009-03-06T11:30:00.000+11:00

Image: Laurie :: Liquid Paper

Friday, pride time. The wonderful Roni posted about finding balance in your life this week, and she linked to another great post about your right to brag. It further reinforced what I am trying to do here on Friday's, it's all too easy to focus on the bad stuff and in doing that all we see is the negative parts of our lives, some would say even attracting more negativity into our lives.

I'm all about changing the self talk and this is a big part of it. Share in the comments, break the cycle, be proud of yourself. This is your life and you are in control of how you feel, why not feel good?

Here are my five for this week.

1. Keeping on with this post. I was feeling a bit like it was boring, for me and for you. Who cares if I cleaned my house? Well I do, and it's not really about the things on this list, it's about making this list. If it works for me it might work for someone else, try it see how you feel.

2. Writing an article for the soon to be MizFitMag. I said I wanted to be a writer so here we go!

3. Organising my exams, one step closer to not failing my studies due to laziness.

4. Not cleaning the house. I'm mixing it up here, I always use cleaning as an excuse to not start something, I hate cleaning, it takes me days to psych myself up to do it, and those are days I spend not doing what I need and want to get done. This week, I left it all and focused on the things I needed to do, and now they're done and I can clean the house. Yay!

5. My relationship. The Ninja and I are totally in synch right now, it takes work and mindful effort, but damn it's so good when it's good. Happy Birthday!

"Maybe it's easier to like someone else's life, and live vicariously through it, than take some responsiblity to change our lives into lives we might like"
Tish Grier

Artificial Sweetener. Friend or Foe?

2009-03-04T21:56:00.010+11:00

Photo: Katalyst

I developed a Diet Coke addiction some time ago. I had never been a soft drink drinker and it was the day I came home with a carton of DC cans that I realised something wasn't quite right. I gave it up after that, mainly because I was sure that drinking a black liquid full of chemicals couldn't be good for me.

Some time later I started looking into the effects of artificial sweeteners and their use, the Dietitian at the hospital I was working in was a huge advocate of diet drinks especially for diabetic patients, and I became more and more curious as I saw the cans piling up in my patients rooms.

There is much controversy surrounding the use of artificial sweeteners. An intriguing documentary produced by Cori Brackett, Sweet Misery: A Poisoned World, looks at various case studies related to neurological symptoms and aspartame, a very common sweetener found in various "diet" products.

There is much speculation about the FDA being corrupted by the dollars of big corporations when it comes to the approval of artificial sweeteners. While this speculation is indeed engaging, and worth doing your own research on, I have become more and more interested in the actual physiological effect of artificial sweeteners and whether they can help or hamper weight loss.

One study done way back in 1986 found that over a one year period the use of artificial sweeteners did not assist in weight loss nor prevent weight gain.

Some interesting data from the San Antonio Heart Study suggests that the more diet soft drink consumed the higher the chance of becoming overweight or obese. For each can of diet soft drink consumed, those in the study were 65% more likely to become overweight over the next 7-8 years and 41% more likely to become obese!

There is also talk of artificial sweeteners increasing appetite, stimulating overeating and leading to weight gain.

Taste conditioning is also something to be considered when reaching for that sugar free gum, mint or drink. When we taste the sweet flavor what happens in our brains? Some researchers speculate that we learn to associate taste with the calorie content of foods, and therefore regulate our calorie intake through taste to some degree.

So when we eat foods that are low in calories, because artificial sweeteners have been used, we may associate this taste with low energy foods. Our brains are tricked into believing that the sweet flavor means lower calories. In a world where most of us are conscious about consuming less calories this can play havoc with appetite, inducing irresistible cravings for sweet foods.

So what to do? I try to focus on eating whole foods with as little processing as possible. That way I find that many of these diet foods don't find their way into my home.

What about you? How do you feel about artificial sweeteners? Please share in the comments, I would love to know what you all think.

"In real life, unlike in Shakespeare, the sweetness of the rose depends upon the name it bears. Things are not only what they are. They are, in very important respects, what they seem to be"
Hubert H. Humphrey

The day I climbed the wall.......

2009-03-02T21:51:00.007+11:00

I'd done a few climbs, almost reaching half way. My arms were aching already and the rush of actually being there was still running through my veins. We moved onto one of the easier sections of wall, The Soul Sistah determined for me to reach the top.

I started slower, taking my time, I passed the half way mark and marveled at the psychological challenge this presented. Just as I negotiated the next section, feeling more confident that I could do it, the Soul Sistah called up, "maybe you should come down real slow."

I had visions of my gargantuan girth straining the support rings, dust falling downward as they were ripped from their rivets. I was going to fall, all my fears were going to be realised, I was too fat for this. I asked a little shakily "Why? Why should I come down?"

The Soul Sistah could see the worry in my eyes, even from that height, and casually and calmly remarked "Well the rope's just a little twisted and maybe you should come down and we can start again."

The relief was instant "I'm not too fat for climbing, I'm not going to break the wall, the footholds, aren't going to crumble under my weight, it's all OK". I let the rope lead me down, down, down to the padded floor below.

Looking up at the wall again, I felt overwhelmed, I can't do this, it's so high, and my arms have lost their will. Maybe I should just try to get to the top next time. The Soul Sistah smiled and said "you're going to get to the top, you can so do this."

I started again, feeling a lump in my throat as I grabbed onto the holds and hoisted myself up the first few sections of the climb. I got to half way, feeling unsure, unsteady, weak. I paused, saying to myself "you can do this, you CAN do this."

On I went, reaching the last hold and gripping over the top of the wall. The lump in my throat broke and I felt tears form in my eyes. I looked down at The Soul Sister as she grinned up at me, giving me the thumbs up.

Down, down, down back to the floor below. I'd done it. I felt all this emotion well up inside as I realised what I'd done. I'd got to the top of the wall. I'd gone rock climbing, something I'd wanted to do for years, something I'd put off because I felt excluded, too fat, not allowed.

I'd gone against every fiber of my cynical self, walked into that air hanger like space, pulled on that harness (that fit!), clipped myself in and changed something inside of myself forever. I can do this, I can do whatever I want. I don't have to fit into a certain dress size, be a certain number on the scale, I can just be me, living my life right now.

"You can never conquer the mountain. You can only conquer yourself"
James Whittaker

Update

2009-02-27T11:22:00.002+11:00

News just in:

I went rock climbing, thus completing half of the February Challenge.
I fit the harness
I did not break anything
I climbed to the top of the wall
I am so so SO proud, shed a few tears
Full report to follow

"Never fear shadows. They simply mean there is a light shining somewhere nearby"
Ruth Renkel

5 Things I'm Proud Of #6

2009-02-27T09:19:00.004+11:00

It's Friday, you know what time it is, time to be proud of all the things you've done. Share in the comments, go on, I dare ya!

1. Getting up early to clean the house

2. Walking home from work

3. Realising I really need to go back to week 2 of the push up challenge, and doing it with good form

4. Resisting the biscuit tin at work

5. Not making any excuses, I'm about to go indoor rock climbing, finally!

"Only Robinson Crusoe had everything done by Friday"
Unknown

Dear Doctor

2009-02-25T10:58:00.004+11:00

Dear Doctor,

I'm writing to you in preparation for our appointment next week in regards to my ongoing knee pain. I have great respect for Doctors, I've worked with many wonderful physicians over the years, smart, quick, responsible, but I have also encountered many as a patient, been laughed at, judged, misdiagnosed, treated unfairly.

So I thought, in order to assist us both in making the process easier and more efficient i would come up with terms of behaviour, so that we may respect each other and achieve the outcomes we desire.

I will

Arrive on time
Explain my problem in a succinct manner
Tell you whether I am prepared to do what you ask of me
Thank you
Appreciate your ability to refer when you feel you don't understand the situation

You will

Apologise for keeping me waiting
Listen to me
Ask questions to clarify my explanation
Respect that I am an intelligent individual
Do a proper assessment
Understand that this is my knee, the knee that means I can't be as active as I want, the knee that means I've given up on bush walking, running, squatting, the knee that may mean nothing to you, oh Dr, but means everything to me.

Thank you for your time, I look forward to working with you to get me back out there.

Yours in gratitude,
Berni

"Surgeons must be very careful
When they take the knife!
Underneath their fine incisions
Stirs the Culprit - Life!"

Emily Dickinson

Support Team

2009-02-23T13:34:00.002+11:00

Not unlike Ewan McGregor and Charley Boorman, on their adventures around the globe, us mere mortal folk also need a support team for when things get rough. Support can come in all shapes and sizes, friends cheering you on, the loving sister convincing you that you don't need to go anywhere near the Tim Tams, and of course the wonderful blogosphere, full of amazing people doing their thing.

A new thing for me is learning to support myself. Breaking that old habit of putting myself down and turning it into a spring of motivational statements, applause and yeeehahs, is somewhat challenging at times.

Sometime I listen to myself chatting away with myself, being all Anthony Robbinsesque and I can't help but think maaaaan this is just too much. Maybe it's an Aussie thing, we aren't known for our ability to motivate and support our high achievers, hell there is even a Wikipedia entry about it.

Whatever it is, I'm working on it, one day at a time, the team is there with radio support whenever I need it and on those days that we don't have reception, I am now able to dust off the cobwebs and become my own cheering squad, and it's kinda nice.

"If you do what you've always done, you'll get what you've always gotten"
Anthony Robbins

5 Things I'm Proud Of #5

2009-02-20T00:20:00.002+11:00

Friday is here again and it's time to look back over the week and remember all the little things. I've been doing this for a while now and I find that it really helps me to stay focused and positive.... so here we go.....

1. Finishing week 4 of the push up challenge, which involved doing an exhaustion test to see how many push ups I could do in a row...... I've found that I need to go back to week 3 and go from there, but that's OK, my form is getting much better and I'm really loving the challenge.

2. Starting a routine which will mean that I actually get my distance education subjects done.

3. Losing 3 cms off my waist..... huh where did it go? I can't find it anywhere. Such a shame, I was so fond of that flab roll ^-^

4. Resting my knee despite feeling frustrated about it.

5. Organising my jewelery from little piles all over the house into one easily accessible drawer. Little things make big differences.

So do tell, what are you proud of this week?

"Let us not take ourselves too seriously. None of us has a monopoly on wisdom"
Queen Elizabeth

Fab Feb, challenge update......

2009-02-18T13:59:00.004+11:00

This should be a report about my fear facing exploits scaling the impossibly high wall at the local indoor rock climbing joint. Alas it is not. Should I disclose my excuses for not going? I think not. They are super lame.... something along the lines of "I'm so tired.... the house is so messy". Yep lame.

I have not faced the fear, I have not even come close..... and lets not even talk about the SCUBA diving.... I mean really, a girl needs time to psych herself up for that kind of stuff.... and money, and I surely don't see much of that lying around lately.

I guess I had good intentions..... or did I? Did I pick two outrageous activities, a short time span (the shortest month of the year even) and then just assume they would happen because I blogged about it? Maybe.

I think this experience is pretty indicative of my weight loss attempts in the past. I start some crazy diet, embark on a ball breaking exercise routine, tell every one about it and then wait for it all to happen to me....... and then it doesn't, or it does for a few days and then I crumble, it really is inhumane to exclude carbs people. Really. I know. I've tried. Too many times.

I am doing it again, sure I'm feeling all proud and righteous about not starting a fad diet, and sticking to exercise I like and can actually do. But here I am sneaking in a goal that's a little out of reach right now, you know why? I do, so I can fail, Sabotaging Me will love it, she's been so quiet lately but I noticed this morning I could hear her smirking. She's looked at the calender, she knows February is nearly over, she's sitting there quietly waiting so she can jump out and yell "Ha Ha Ha. I knew it... you fool, as if you would ever go rock climbing.... and SCUBA diving! Ha. Really?......"

Then I would fall into a pit of despair, forget about all the realistic progress I have made and mope around feeling like a fraud.....

Well I'm sorry to tell you SM, the ruse is up. I know what you're at and it aint gunna fly down here at Healthy Lifestyle Be Kind to Yourself Ranch.... no sirree. Back to the drawing board lady, I'm on to you!

February continues........ watch this space for updates.

"You're only given a little spark of madness. You mustn't lose it"
Robin Williams

Weekend Challenge

2009-02-16T12:19:00.004+11:00

Now this isn't a challenge like the January Challenge nor the February Challenge. This is the ongoing struggle that is the weekend, time to catch up with friends, eat drink and be merry. This weekend's challenges included my all time favourite Malaysian place, yum cha and a new exciting totally delicious experience, Brazillian Churrascaria. There are always healthy options but, why oh why is it so hard to stick with them?

The next challenge I faced on the weekend was the return of an old injury, the dodgy knee, a very technical term, I know. I've had said knee poked, prodded, acupunctured, X-rayed, ultrasounded, taped and heat treated to no avail. There isn't any apparent damage or disorder, but when it hurts it really really hurts. I was totally off my feet for about a month last year after ignoring the signs, ending up in a swollen painful mess.

This time I'm listening to my body and resting up. The sad thing is I think what has caused this unwanted revisitation is the starting of the Couch to 5K program this week, which now must be shelved until a later date. I'm bummed out , I was really looking forward to the wind in my hair, my first race, my first marathon, triathlon.... ehhem.... getting a little carried away there.

I guess it's back to the basics, somedays it really does feel like one step forward two steps back, this is such a long road and I feel like I'm looking up at a mountain today.

"Still round the corner there may wait, a new road, or a secret gate"
J.R.R. Tolkein

5 Things I'm Proud Of Today #4

2009-02-13T20:41:00.004+11:00

Hey folks, it's that time again, time to focus on the positives and remind ourselves of achievements other than a decreasing number on the scale.

1. Reaching Week 4 of the push up challenge.

2. Testing my real proper push-up ability and finding I can now do 1 real push-up...... yippee!!

3. Increasing my basic cardio routine by 66% in the last 2 months.... slow and steady really works.

4. Starting the Couch to 5k running program.

5. Fitting into a pair of jeans that have been firmly in the too small pile I've got stashed away in my spare room.... wooohooo!!

Share along in the comments....... what cool things have you been up to?

"Winners compare their achievements with their goals, while losers compare their achievements with those of other people"
Nido Qubein

Some Numbers and a Lifestyle Change

2009-02-11T09:22:00.007+11:00

The last few weeks I've been thinking more and more about this whole lifestyle change thing. You know how it goes, you reach for a protein bar instead of a meal and "they" shout out, that won't work, you must change your lifestyle. I have to say, "they" are right. Considering all the pills, shakes, bars and strange mono diets that have passed my lips I should be a representation of the ideal body by now, but alas I aint.

I have tried this lifestyle approach in the past, worked out what I believe to be the perfect routine and then proceeded to do it, let's just say the whole macrobiotic, yoga, pilates, situation didn't last too long. Yesterday I realised where I'd gone wrong, I was imitating what I thought was a healthy lifestyle rather than building my healthy life.

I feel that despite the ups and downs of all my dieting and attempts at imitating Gwyneth Paltrow's diet and fitness regime, I have to say I'm really glad I've tried. In trying I've created the perfect trial and error testing ground, I know what works for me, whether that be weighing myself once a month or not restricting food groups.

The best thing is I can't fail now, because I'm creating this. If something doesn't work, it's not because I'm a big fat idiot who can't do anything right, it's because that approach wasn't right for me and in finding that, I'm getting closer and closer to what is right, and that's a good feeling.

Oh, and here are some new numbers....

Starting point 13/11/08
Weight: 109.9kg
Bust: 115cm
Upper Arm: 36cm
Waist (narrowest part): 95cm
Waist (at belly button): 114cm
Hips: 127cm
Upper Thigh: 76cm
Knee: 49cm
Calf: 46cm

11/02/09
Weight: 107.6kg (1/2/09)
Bust: 111cm
Upper Arm: 34cm
Waist #1: 91cm
Waist #2: 99cm/111cm- not sure of tape placement here....
Hips: 124cm
Upper Thigh: 72cm
Knee: 46cm
Calf: 45cm

"The trouble with doing something right the first time is that nobody appreciates how difficult it was"
Walt West

Why I'm determined to lose weight

2009-02-09T12:04:00.003+11:00

I've felt the focus slipping a bit these last few days so I thought I'd just remind myself of why I want to do this once and for all, and here, for your reading pleasure, are some of the reasons......

So I feel strong, healthy, flexible and move forward in life

So I never feel like I don't deserve things/experiences ever again

So I never have to shop in the plus sized section again

So I don't feel the sides of an airplane seat crushing me in

So I feel like the outside is an expression of the inside

So I can get excited about dressing up to go out

So I can say I did it.

So I can include I lost 40kgs on one of my 5 Things I'm Proud Of posts, then laugh and giggle and run around the room shouting hurray hurraay hurrrahh!!

"If you are going through hell, keep going"
Winston Churchill

5 Things I'm Proud Of #3

2009-02-04T10:19:00.010+11:00

Here we go again folks, don't forget to focus on the positives no matter how small.

1. Making it to Day 1 Week 3 of the Push Up Challenge.... ouch

2. Getting over the weigh day doom and gloom.... back on track, ready to rock.

3. Setting a time for rock climbing...... aaahhhhrk, still pretty freaked out.

4. Cooking instead of eating out despite my total lack of inspiration and burning desire to eat here.

5. The wonderful community at MizFit......... what a cool bunch of peeps, so proud to be in such great company.

So get loud, be proud, what are you up to?

"Don't worry bout a thing, every little thing is gonna be alright"
Bob Marley

February's Challenge-Facing the Fear

2009-02-02T12:07:00.006+11:00

This months challenge is all about doing things I've wanted to do for a while but had some crazy irrational fear stopping me.

This are two of them:

Indoor rock climbing...... eeek! It's not what you think, I am not scared of heights. I'm terrified to the point of shaking of not fitting in the harness, ripping the support rings out of the ceiling with my humungous heaviness, not being able to haul my lard ass up the wall.

SCUBA diving......... ahhhrk! Again not what you think, no fear of being eaten by sharks, no fear of being under water. My very real long term fear is that they won't have a wet suit to fit me.

So what are your fears? Are you ready to face them?

"Don't be afraid to go out on a limb, that's where the fruit is"
H. Jackson Browne

Weigh Day

2009-02-01T10:49:00.008+11:00

So it's the 1st of February today and the official end of January's Challenge. I woke early this morning drifting in and out of sleep, dreaming of weighing myself, sometimes I gained, sometimes I lost, most of the dreams ended just before I saw that number pop up. When I finally was awake enough to contemplate the task ahead I padded down the hall trying to work out if I hadn't already done this, the dreams seemed so real.

I got the Wii balance board all ready only to discover it had run out of batteries, damn! With my heart beating a little faster I pulled apart the remotes looking for the right ones. Batteries in place I followed the prompts and impatiently waited for the result.

A loss of 900gms...... hmm, disappointment surrounded me as I stood there staring at the screen. Can that be right? It's been six weeks. Shoulders slumped I crawled back into bed next to the sleeping Ninja and shed a tear or two. As I slipped back into dream land I felt the weight of a bad weigh day hit me and I thought "hmmmmm here it comes, maybe I can sleep through it?"

I woke up and had a chat to The Ninja about my disappointment, we talked about the time frame, that a two week Christmas New Year Holiday fell in my six weeks and that that time wasn't exactly spent with weight loss in mind, in fact I probably gained weight. I still felt a bit sad, then she came back, Sabotaging Me crept into my mind without a sound and said loud and clear "you can't do anything right, you're not even working right now, all you have to do is focus on weight loss and you can't even do that".

I could have fell down right there, I felt the pull into the abyss, I started stumbling toward the edge, I could feel my heart sinking, the tears rolling, the happiness of the last six weeks ebbing away. I mustered all my strength, came back to reality and said "NO!" SM scuttled away back into her cage. I'm facing today like any other day, I'm going to keep on keeping on, because that's all I can do, and I'm going to be proud of every gram of that 900 because that's 900gms in the right direction.

"Little by little one walks far"

Peruvian Proverb

Watch this

2009-01-30T15:19:00.003+11:00

Got this clip from Roni's Thursday Thoughts, I think I'll play it when I'm going through my next Too Hard moment.

I hope this post makes up for it's lack of size, by having a high word to links ratio :)

Some nonsense......

2009-01-29T10:21:00.004+11:00

Last night I went to see an incredible piano performance at the City Recital Hall. Two wonderful musicians playing together in a beautiful space, creating what I can only describe as sound for the soul. It's nothing but inspiring to hear music like this performed live, to see the faces, the fingers, the smiles, the light in the eyes of the performers that says, "I'm totally diggin this, life is good". I left invigorated, walking home through the city in the cool night feeling like I could do anything.

Today that feeling remains as a quiet hum and I'm musing on what exactly happened there in that acoustically perfect room. Was it the sake with dinner before the show, the air conditioned relief from the sticky streets, or the opportunity to watch two dudes do what they love with such passion, lightness and love? Maybe it was the music, damn that music was good. Whatever it was it got me thinking about life and the road that I'm on, how I got here and where I'm headed. I fantasize a fair bit about where I'm headed, some might call this daydreaming I like to think of it more as positive affirmations, not the manifest a car park, borderline loopy affirmations, more like............ ok ok it's mainly daydreams.

So what am I trying to say here, I'm inspired, inspired to create a life of daydreams, inspired to keep on keeping on, to see this road and all it's twists and turns. Life isn't about a number on a scale, yet it is about being who you want to be, and with some focus, practice and dedication I too can be like the two dudes bashin on the keys thinking... damn life is good.

"I like nonsense, it wakes up the brain cells. Fantasy is a necessary ingredient in living, It's a way of looking at life through the wrong end of a telescope. Which is what I do, And that enables you to laugh at life's realities".

Dr. Seuss

5 Things I'm Proud Of Today #2

2009-01-26T17:30:00.014+11:00

I've written about this exercise before and have been thinking about making it a regular thing. So here's a few little things I was proud of today.

1. Attempting Tabata style hill sprints in the park- Geeezuhs, that surely gets the heart a pumping and the lungs a thumping.

2. Pasting code into my blog all on my lonesome- nothing like some good old trial and error to get things done.

3. Making a kick ass salad to munch on- great food is so good for the soul

4. Completing week one of The Push Up Challenge- 5 real push ups here I come!

5. Not caving and weighing myself before the Feb 1st deadline- 5 days to go, the countdown is on.

Feel free to share things you're proud of in the comments, would be great to hear about what everyone else is doing out there.

"Just don't give up on what you really want to do. Where there is love and inspiration, I don't think you can go wrong."
Ella Fitzgerald

The Push Up Challenge

2009-01-22T11:41:00.005+11:00

One of my New Years Resolutions was to do 5 push ups. I haven't been doing anything about it, unless thinking... hmm how on Earth will I ever do 5 push ups counts. It must be said that I have zero upper body strength, I am amazed that I can even carry my groceries with these feeble yet generously proportioned arms. So I had no idea how to start achieving this goal until I came across this site in a frenzy of blog lurking tangent following time wasting internet gorging.

Luckily for me the creator of this program saw people like me coming and provided options for those of us who are a little challenged in the area of negotiating our body weight in a horizontal position. Enter the knee push up, I don't look quite as graceful or at ease as the dude demonstrating on the site, in fact I felt a bit like my shoulders where going to pop through my back and render me armless, but I managed 3 so that qualifies me to start.

Push ups have always been a dream of mine, something I fantasize about being able to do in my perfect "skinny" life where nothing goes wrong ..... I would get up in my beautiful serene bedroom, white curtain dancing in the breeze coming from my window over looking the sea. Hunker down on my polished floorboards admiring my manicured nails and proceed to launch into a set of perfect form push ups in my co-ordinated sleepwear, never breaking a sweat. I'd jump up, swish my immaculate hair and saunter out to the deck where my cook would have prepared a delicious breakfast with the papers waiting...... HA!

Back in the real world, I'm logging in and going for the 6 week challenge. Anyone want to join me?

"Reach high, for stars lie hidden in your soul. Dream deep, for every dream precedes the goal"
Pamela Vaull Starr

January's Challenge Update....

2009-01-20T11:24:00.003+11:00

So my challenge for January was to stay away from the scales. There are many reasons I decided to stop weighing myself for a while, the main one being that my mood was being defined by that number that appeared and it wasn't such a pretty picture. Since not weighing myself I've found that I don't think about my weight or weight loss so much, I just seem to be getting on with things, which is nice, having some space to stroll around in my head has proven to be promising.

I must admit Feb 1st is looming in my mind, what if I've put on weight, not lost any weight, lost a puny amount of weight... what then? Will all those weeks of not weighing myself and feeling OK about it dissipate and leave me with a months worth of bad weigh days in one? I guess I will find out when the day comes.

"The key to change.... is to let go of fear"
Rosanne Cash

5 tips on walking

2009-01-15T09:34:00.007+11:00

What a morning! I've done some exercise, reviewed some Japanese, had breakfast, read all the blogs I love to read, done some measurements (lost 2 cm off the old waist) and organised some stuff I've been promising to do for weeks, maybe even stalked some people on Facebook. And it's only 930 AM. Just thought I'd mention my good doings, this feeling rarely lasts and I figure you gotta make the most of it while you can.

I do think that exercise has something to do with this burst of energy and focus, Facebook is all about the focus.... This last week I've been doing two things on the exercise front.

I'm trying to form a habit by doing 15min minimum on the Wonderfully Fandangled Exercise Machine, before breakfast.
Walk walk walk walk. I am a fan of walking, I get some of my best ideas pounding the pavement and I've been walking for at least an hour each day, you should hear some of my ideas, shame most revolve around what clothes I'll wear when I'm skinny rather than ways to make the money needed to buy said clothes.

I don't know if it's the endorphins, the car fumes or just getting out of the house, but I'm feeling good, SM has gone back into hiding and I feel like I can do this.

I know walking isn't the exercise of choice for alot of folks, but it's free, easy and doesn't involve mirrors and reflections of gym bunnies in lycra pumping iron, and that's the guys in my neck of the woods, don't even get me started on the gals. So for your reading pleasure I thought I'd give you my 5 top tips on walking.

1. Wear good shoes. I suffered for some time with plantar fasciitis and now fully appreciate the need for good shoes, and orthotics. Especially when walking in the City on all that concrete you need support for those arches.

2. Walk somewhere. I find this is what gets me out there, need to do some shopping, want to find some obscure book, give yourself a reason for walking, walking to work is always a winner. I also like to make the walk an event, there's some great coastal walks here that are always a total joy, not to mention a fab people perving experience.

3. Cover up. You don't want to get all stunning and lithe only to have the skin of an elephants arse on your face to deal with. Get out that dorky hat and slather on that greaseless sunscreen, no-one should ever wear that heavy duty sweat like you're in a sauna crap.

4. Walk at pace. it's no good strolling around the shops for an hour thinking you're doing yourself a favour. You gots ta sweat, and not just because you've got thick pasty sunscreen on, get that heart rate up and keep it up.

5. Stretch. Oh it's just a little walk, I hear you say, but if any of you could see my impersonation of an 80yr old woman shuffling down the hall in the mornings, you'd know that to stretch is to be comfortable, I mean look at Madonna, she stretches her shit all day long and she looking Hhot!

"All truly great thoughts are conceived while walking"
Nietzsche

Everyone loves a good before and after

2009-01-12T11:33:00.005+11:00

So here I am upping the ante. I was inspired by by Giyen over at baconismyenemy, and her video post on CNN iReport. It takes some serious balls to shout out to the world like she has and it got me thinking, I gots ta get more serious here at Yo-yo No More. Although it makes me feel like pooping my pants, I'm going to start recording my measurements out here in the real world, eeeek. No-one likes a story without pictures so I am going to also post some progress pics.

I like the idea of starting from January, New Year, new life, clean slate. I found this glamorous pic of me treking through the rivers over New Year. Whilst the locale is beautiful and my wonderful Soul Sistah in the background is a stunning example of my genetic make-up at it's physical best, the headgear is somewhat embarrassing, hopefully it detracts from the similar shapes encircling my mid section.

So folks, here are some stats, starting from the day I started this very blog.

13th November 2008
Weight: 109.9kg (ahhhhhhhrgk)
Bust: 115cm
Upper Arm: 36cm
Waist (narrowest part): 95cm
Waist (at belly button): 114cm
Hips: 127cm
Upper Thigh: 76cm
Knee: 49cm
Calf: 46cm

18th December 2008
Weight: 108.5kg
Bust: 113cm
Upper Arm: 35cm
Waist (narrowest part): 91cm
Waist (at belly button): 102cm
Hips: 126cm
Upper Thigh: 74cm
Knee: 47cm
Calf: 46cm

Watch this space for monthly updates.

"He who is brave is free"
Seneca

Ganbatte Bunny-chan!

2009-01-08T16:17:00.008+11:00

See look at that, I'm speaking Japanese already, ha! Ganbatte translates roughly to "go for it", so here I am cheering myself on.

The Inspired Wanderer sent me a great link about exercise requirements needed for weight loss yesterday. 60mins of moderate intensity per day is needed to get you and keep you looking trim and taut, some researchers even suggest up to 90mins of sweatarobics per day. Hmm, I guess my meager 15min on the Wonderfully Fandangled Exercise Machine and an occasional stroll up the shops isn't really cutting it.

Handy piece of info to have, crazy what my brain does when I get said info and try to process it through my chipped and rusty neurons. If you haven't already noticed, I seem to have a very strong self sabotaging switch that gets turned on rather regularly, and even though said switch flicked on last night I seem to have returned to the land of the living within record breaking time and even managed to do 60mins of exercise today. What is going on here, could it be? Could I be actually trying to change?

Just so you don't think I've turned into a super positive, crazy, together type, I'll let you in on what remains of the melodramatic me.

Input: 60min of exercise is required per day to lose weight

Stage 1: Hmmm an hour of exercise sure is more than what I'm doing right now, maybe I'll just increase it slowly.

Stage 2: (SM appears, she's been on holiday and is back with a tan and a mighty foul mouth) "Who are you kidding, you f#@ing loser of all losers, you won't even last the c#$@ing week doing the 15mins/day, and you dare to entertain the idea of b%$#dy increasing your exercise, HA! I laugh at you and your wobbly thighs Ha!"

Stage 3: Go to bed crying and feeling like a lost cause.

Stage 4: Get up in the middle of the night, freak out about having gestational diabetes (note, there is no impending pregnancy, just midnight madness) do some research online and freak out some more, go back to bed dreaming of my diabetic offspring and their medical bills.

Now what usually happens here is a period of a few days to a week of feeling pretty shit about life, eating like a newly released POW, with the idea of exercise being not much more than watching Run Lola Run. But something strange happened last night, it could have been the cool breeze, maybe it was the clean sheets, but a whole new stage emerged, and I am awed by it's simplicity and it's courage.

Stage 5: Wake up feeling determined to rid myself of the risk of gestational diabetes, and endeavor to do 60mins of exercise today.

"Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anybody can start today and make a new ending"
Maria Robinson

Happy New Year

2009-01-06T09:21:00.005+11:00

For the last few years I've made the same vague resolutions and not kept them, so for a change this year I thought I'd use these resolutions and solidify them a bit so I actually have a tangible goal to reach for. This is them:

Lose weight- For this I think I'll give myself a number, I know I know, it's not about the number it's about being healthy and feeling good about yourself blah blah blah blah.... but I need to get somewhere on this one, and I'm hoping a solid goal will help me. So this year I resolve to lose 20kgs.

Get fit- Hmmm, fit, what does that mean exactly? Well usually, in my mind, it means looking buff and having some kind of lean body mass to speak of. It's never really had anything to do with physical ability, speed, endurance or stamina, I want to be fit so I look hot, is that too much to ask? In keeping with my idea I've simplified this one into one task. So this year I resolve to be able to do 5 real push ups.

Learn Japanese- A long time wish of mine that I hoped would just come true one morning, I've got the books, the flash-cards, and the CDs but my conversation skills are somewhat lacking. Now this one has some importance, last year after a flurry of New Years Resolution madness I enrolled in an intensive summer course, got inspired and wrote my nephew a birthday card in Japanese!! In this said birthday card, I spoke of becoming somewhat fluent in Japanese so that he and I could shoot the breeze one day. I can't let him down, he is the cutest, most adorable wonderful human ever to walk the Earth and he's now started talking. So this year I resolve to learn hiragana, katakana and 100 kanji, as well as do a chapter each month from my text book.

So there you have it, New Years Resolutions, its' a bit scary, turning them into something real like that. It means that there is a possibility that I will fail in a quantifiable way. But this is it folks, this is my life and it's time to live it failures and all.

"My imperfections and failures are as much a blessing from God as my successes and my talents, and I lay them both at his feet"
Mahatma Gandhi

Today the sane day

2008-12-18T09:15:00.001+11:00

Since starting this blogging venture I have lost a total of 2 kgs. Up until today I have been disappointed with this number. Despite many many clinical trials showing that a loss of 12kgs per year is considered the healthy norm, those figures first burnt into my brain as a teen have prevailed. I remember getting a fabulous Nutrimetics meal replacement program as a young lass and being very pleased to note that weight loss should be experienced at a rate of 1-1.5kgs per week. Damn those shakes were nasty, who's brilliant idea was that crap anyway? Not that the repulsiveness stopped me, I went on to try Herbalife, yurck, twice, blerch.

1-1.5kgs per week, I thought to myself, "I'm a good girl, I try really hard at everything I do, I can like totally do this, I might even lose more weight, cos like, I'm above average at school and stuff". Surprise, surprise, it didn't work out that way, and I was left feeling a little like a failure. This malarkey has stuck with me for a long time, much to my surprise today, this very lucid sane day.

When I first read the 12kg/year statistics, I was majorly pissed off, not unlike the time The Ninja showed me how much an image of a model is Photoshopped to try and make me feel better. I was pissed because I felt let down, "What do you meeeean?? I can't ever look like that/lose that much weight? Am I doomed to a life of mediocrity and normalness just like everyone else???" It was akin to being told Santa didn't exist, my world crumbled down around my ears and I clutched onto my inspiration pic of Jessica Alba in a bikini sobbing like a toddler in the corner.

Today I don't feel quite so deluded, it may have something to do with my recent visit to the Norman Lindsay Gallery, seeing all those round, erotic, sexy, ladies getting their fancy on in the paintings left me feeling, well, happily, voluptuously, normal.

Today, this wonderfully sane day, I noticed something about weighing myself. Weigh day is fraught with anxiety and anticipation. I've been weighing myself with the Wii. In order to do so you must create a character, a Mii, and the little dudette grows to fit your measurements, needless to say my Mii is a little on the portly side. Each week I am greeted with an "oh no too high", my Mii hangs her head in shame, and the words OBESE flash up on the screen. WTF? How could I have not realised how sick that is? Step away from the scales lady, step away from the scales.

Now in comes the almighty tape measurements. An activity that may well have been introduced to me during the delightful meal replacement drink days. Since starting this blog I've lost a total of 21cms. That's double figures, a much more pleasing concept. I have oft toyed with idea of only doing measurements and that has now officially become January's challenge. No more scales. Even as I type this I feel my heartbeat quicken and my palms become clammy. Doesn't weighing myself equal control? How on earth will I know what's going on if I don't know how much I weigh? Will I fall off the wagon and stop caring if I'm not confronted with that scary number each week? Why even invent such a ridiculous challenge?

Have no fear, I say, the tape measure has been a much kinder friend for all these years and I never realised, kind of like that quiet guy at school who is really nice and funny and turns out to be the greatest thing that ever happens to you. Let's just hope good ole tape measure and I can stay buddies over Christmas :)

"Any measurement must take into account the position of the observer. There is no such thing as measurement absolute, there is only measurement relative"
Jeanette Winterson

Reporting Back

2008-12-17T12:01:00.002+11:00

I'm amazed, all went well. I substituted the cake for a few Dorritos and forgave myself for half a glass of champagne. You heard it here folks, I can show restraint and moderation, even if I had to sit on my hands at times to do so. Now there's just the small matter of the next two weeks in The Bush with The Posse, The Folks and no doubt some holiday cheer, I guess I will just take each day as it comes.

"It matters if you just don't give up"
Stephen Hawking

Priscilla

2008-12-13T12:34:00.005+11:00

It's all too easy, especially after a few Christmas beverages, to think, stuff the weight loss, I've got a good life, great friends a sexy husband type person. I'm just going to enjoy it. Then I went to see Priscilla, and all those lithe bodies dancing around made me think.... hmmm while I may not have the chance to ever look like a shockingly buff 20 year old gay man in chaps, I do have the chance to look like a fit healthy 30 something year old woman, and I really shouldn't give up on that so soon.

So today's challenge is a BBQ to celebrate the Luscious L's birthday, and my mission is to avoid the beverages (loss of inhibition and eating three bags of chips is a real issue for me), only have enough food to feed one person, avoid the snacks and if there's a birthday cake, to enjoy a sample size slice and not go back and sneakily sneak a sliver each time I walk past.

So there you have it, today's challenge. Be sure to watch this space for a report on the results.

"Accept the challenges so that you may enjoy the exhilaration of victory"

General George S. Patton

Over it.....

2008-12-07T13:44:00.005+11:00

Now that I'm over my little "The world is against fat people, let's unite, sit on them skinny biatches and suffocate them" insecurity. I mean, I really can be a tad over sensitive at times. I have devised another rule for riding the Diet Express. After a night of red wine, the most amazing banana bread (big ups to the Alpaca and his culinary expertise), roast potatoes, butter, cheese, chocolate, did I mention butter, great company and the most intense board game known to man, I have decided that events such as these cannot be missed.

Yeah sure I can eat my diet sized portions, avoid all the good stuff, not let a drop of the calorie laden, liver impairing alcohol pass my lips and go home feeling "in control" and righteous, or I can enjoy my life, share some food with friends, drink a little too much wine, fall into a deep satisfied slumber and wake up smiling and thinking these are the memories I'm going to have when I'm old and crusty.

Dieting is all good and well and I think that for 6 of the 7 days I will show some restraint and reign in the indulgences. But one day, of every week, I want to feel normal, I want to feel that I too can enjoy food without being wracked with guilt for days after the event. So damn naggit, that's what I'm going to do.

No more, Forgive me Father for I have sinned and my penance will be to deprive myself for as long as I can, oh yeah this time will be different, this time I will have the perseverance of a self flagellation loving worshiper and before sun down I will be basking in a self denying glow. And if I don't, which I won't, I will lie on a bed of nails and smack myself round the head while SM verbally abuses me until the cows come home. No more.

So my loves, at this time of year, enjoy your cake, your chocolate, your wine and roasts, but remember to get that booty shakin and oh yeah, be nice to yourself :)

"Food is an important part of a balanced diet"
Fran Lebowitz

Beware, bitter rant ahead......

2008-12-04T16:03:00.001+11:00

This is a picture of The Ninja and fellow travelers jumping off a boat into Halong Bay in Vietnam. I love jumping off things into water, it's one of my all time favorite things to do. I didn't jump off this boat, and every time I see these pictures I regret it. Why didn't I jump off the boat? Because I was embarrassed to be seen in my swimmers. I missed out on this magical experience not because I was fat, but because I felt like other people would judge me because of this. *Cue sad violin music*

The delightful SM does have a lot to do with this, but I am slowly realising other people around me that contribute to this feeling, it's mainly because Fat is the new Black. No longer is it tolerated to publicly deride people of other races as it once was, we can't talk crap about the Japs or the Chinks and definitely not the Niggers, and well we shouldn't. Some people still need a group to belittle in order to make themselves feel worthwhile and there is something out there that defines a group of people that's constantly in hunting season, the overweight, the obese, The Fatties.

Now you'd think I'd be a bit tougher when it comes to these remarks, having first been told I was a Fatty at the ripe young age of 9, but over the years I have become more and more sensitive. I no longer come home and cry and feel rejected, nowadays I get downright pissed off. What gives people the right to comment on someone else's weight? And what, pray tell, does someone's dress size have to do with their intelligence, ability in the workplace or their sexiness? And why do people think it's OK to talk like that in front of me? A fellow Fatty.

The comments aren't usually directed at the fat person in the room, they are discussions about "other people" that apparently aren't like you. Not unlike the talks had around one of the gorgeous Koori girls I went to school with, who wasn't like the "others" because her family didn't live on The Mission.

I have to say, after doing a retrospective observational study using my own experience as data (highly rigorous), that the majority of perpetrators of this socially permissible act are women. You do get men playing along like the incredible Endocrinologist I went to see, full of hope that he would have some answers for me about weight loss as a hypothyroid person, who told me I was just lazy, no questions, no proper assessment, you're fat that means you're lazy, that will be $300 please.

Women are increasingly insecure, we are bombarded with images of the perfect woman, who not only represents about 3% of the population in physical attributes but is airbrushed into a cartoon character that no human being could ever look like. Girls as young as 5 years old are reported to have body image issues and starting to diet, 5 years old people! There is something very wrong with this picture.

The magazines, movies and graphic artists are not all to blame, this problem starts in your own backyard. I've listened to may criticisms of the "fat people". Friends that giggle about how so-and-so has put on so much weight and looks so bad, a group of friends delighted in stripping down a teacher of ours who had put on a few kilos, proceeded to say they could never take anyone seriously giving out health advice that didn't look "the part", right there next to me, a rather zaftig lass who works in the healthcare industry.

It's not just the average Jo either, I was recently at a seminar for health professionals about weight loss techniques and the presenter herself kept making comments and rolling her eyes about the "fat clients" and how they are just lazy or have an excuse for everything. During a lecture on obesity the lecturer commented on how she hated fat clients because they just never did anything about it.

Don't even get me started on the mass emails sent around with a group of fat women in bikinis and some fat-est remark that's supposed to be funny, let's not forget that great bumper sticker that was so popular a while back "fat chicks go home".

What a state we are in when health professionals that are meant to help and support people to lose weight, have the opinion that every overweight person that walks through their door is stupid, lazy and a lost cause. What a state we are in when women are judged so harshly by our own, held down by the very people that should be holding us up and helping us along.

"People in glass houses have to answer the bell"
Bruce Patterson

5 Things I'm Proud of Today #1

2008-12-02T13:35:00.010+11:00

As I went through the motions on my Wonderfully Fandangled Exercise Machine this morning, I thought I must have put in 3 hours rather than 30 mins because each second seemed to drag on like a Celine Dion concert. How does this happen I ask you, why does 30mins spent exercising seem so much longer than 30mins spent doing something else, like eating or napping, or watching an episode of Flight of the Conchords?

Despite the complaining, I am proud that I did some exercise and on that note, I thought I'd introduce my new technique of mind altering, self styled, behavior modification. I am told, by the beautiful Ms Netherlands, who also happens to be a psychologist, that this style of mind bending is named Cognitive Behavior Therapy, for all those interested. Anyway, this thing that I thought up is called 5 Things I'm Proud of Today (not to be confused with the insightful and hilarious 5 Things That Piss Me Off Today as authored by The Fabulous A).

I started doing this when Sabotaging Me was keeping me up at night with her ranting. To keep her quiet I forced myself to think of 5 things I'd done that day that I was proud of, they can be absolutely anything, but the rules are that they have to be positive, they have to be written down or spoken aloud, and if I start on the self flagellation routine I have to think of an extra thing to be proud of.

Some examples include:

I'm proud of myself for starting and sharing this blog
I'm proud of myself for doing the washing
I'm proud of myself for walking to the shops instead of driving

A variation that developed over time was taking an instance that I would have normally chastised myself for and finding something in that situation that I was proud of, for example, I'm proud that I exercised portion control when I went out to eat tantalising curries with The Soul Sister and The Bodacious Bro-inlaw, instead of how SM would've put it, "you fat loser, you ate Indian, there's so much oil and grease, you over did the carbs and that garlic cheese naan is going to mark your body for an eternity".

It's a funny thing, when I do this I can actually feel SM squirm in her cage, at the beginning I feel self-conscious and awkward, but by number 5 I'm thinking "woo-hoo I'm alright" and at times, if you listen really carefully, you might even hear me think "Yippeee, I'm fricken awesome!"

"I loathe narcissism, but I approve of vanity"
Diana Vreeland

Coming down......

2008-11-28T10:51:00.007+11:00

There's the initial rush of conformity, the high of a decent loss and then the concept of the road that lies ahead sets in, and you really do come down from that feeling of being able to change your world. Sabotaging Me trots out in her high heels and reminds me that I've been here before, this feeling of potential achievement has crashed down before and she glowingly reminds me how that went.

My dearest J Rose, who is such an inspiration in the weight loss stakes, recently emailed me her support and said there isn't a day that goes by that she doesn't struggle with this battle, and she's right. There are ALWAYS temptations, opportunities to slip up or not bother, whether it's the sweets The Patron Saint of My Current Existence brings back from Japan, or the fact that The Folks are visiting for the weekend, I am always going to have to make choices, and at times, those choices seem hard to make.

The Ninja is always reminding me I'm too hard on myself, that SM comes out way to often to drag me down into a pit of apathy and resignation. Why is it that we hold on to our SM's? Why can't we all just let them run free together in some land inside our heads, beating each other up until all that is left is a few blobs of subconsciousness, wibble wobbling on the floor like jelly on a plate. Why do we love them so?

As I sit here with SM rattling her cage desperate to get out, I remember all the other times I have let her at me, all the times I've made a choice that has meant that I haven't got what I wanted, and I think maybe it's time to let her go. Not lock her up so that she can find a way to escape later and catch me by surprise, but really let her go. I'm not sure how to do it yet so for now I'm just going to keep on keeping on, go through the motions and see where that takes me.

"We are what we repeatedly do.
Excellence, therefore, is not an act but a habit"
Aristotle

The Secret......

2008-11-24T22:11:00.009+11:00

Where does that feeling come from? That feeling of restlessness that won't quit until you've fed it enough to put yourself into a coma. It's a hard feeling to fight, you drink water, you do exercise, you watch mind numbingly stupid movies, but it persists like a telemarketer with a death wish. I fed it tonight, cheese on toast, washed down with cups of tea to try and blunt the gnawing emptiness that just goes on and on.

Now the self appointed new-age emotional healers out there would say that I must have some deep psychological need that's not being met, that I should nurture my inner child, perhaps I need to get some aura cleansing or attend a re-birthing workshop so I can rid myself of my Mother's issues. Yeah well after some naval gazing I stopped myself from watching a performance from the You're Broken and Can't Be Fixed Choir featuring Sabotaging Me as the guest soprano, and realised the error in my ways.

Ladies and Gentlemen I'm about to reveal the big secret, no you don't have to buy my E-Book to find out, nor do you have to subscribe to my wonderfully regular emails claiming you will lose 25kgs in 2 weeks if you purchase said E-Book. My secret is simple, boring and something we've all heard before *drum-roll*
Eat Breakfast. Wow, earth shattering, ground breaking stuff going on here.

To other, more sensible people, this may seem rather simple, but for a long time resident of Crazy Town, this is a revelation of biblical proportions, you can't imagine my relief when I realised my totally suppressed deep psychic damage was really just a simple need for some porridge.

"There is nothing as deceptive as an obvious fact"
Sir Arthur Conan Doyle

Making friends with The Exercise

2008-11-22T00:20:00.002+11:00

While the Patron Saint of My Current Existence is off in Japan tending to Obaachan, I've had the pleasure of looking after The Beasts. Let me tell you, dogs take effort, don't go getting a puppy for your kids at Christmas thinking it's going to be easy, they need to be walked EVERY day, rain, hail or shine, not to mention the unmentionables you need to deal with. Believe it or not they do get picky about where they are walking too, no going down the same road day after day to the sad looking park at the end of the street, these Beasts demand quality. So to mix things up a bit, I've been getting up and taking them to The Big Exciting Park every morning.

At first I was just strolling around, avoiding the hills and thinking to myself, look at you out every morning in the fresh air getting your daily exercise. After a week I thought to myself, this is good but maybe it's time to pick up the pace. So after some consideration I stared to walk a bit faster and even went up the hills. Wowser, talk about a shock. I think I must have developed asthma during The Year of The Zombie, because I sounded like a life time smoker in desperate need of a tracheotomy. The most depressing part was I used to actually run around this park, well jog may be a more appropriate term. Here I was lugging my thunderous thighs up the hills getting overtaken by The Little Beast, who is at least 60 in dog years and not too svelte himself.

Sabotaging Me came out in full force "Look at you, you lazy arse, you've been so lazy that you've actually got asthma, now you'll never ever be able to exercise ever again, you'll be a fat loser forever!" I gathered up all my strength and did my best Bush listening to the public impression I could muster, and ignored SM.

I'm still going to the park every morning, I'm even jogging up one of the hills, and doing some step ups on a low wall. Surprise surprise, I've stopped wheezing so much and it's only been a few weeks :)

"For the loser now will be later to win, for the times they are a-changin"
Bob Dylan

But it's too hard......

2008-11-20T20:51:00.005+11:00

This is often my battle cry when I'm losing the fight, it's rather lacking in it's Braveheart type inspiration. I'll say this over and over again at many junctures until I convince myself that it really is too hard and lay back down on the couch and read some trashy magazine to lift my spirits.

This is how some of those scenarios go:

Hopeful me: So I guess I should get up and do some exercise now, it's a beautiful day and The Beasts would love to go for a walk in the park.
Sabotaging me: The park is so far away, I'm sure I should check Facebook again and you know, it's just too hard.......

HM: There's plenty of food in the fridge to whip up a tasty lunch to take to work tomorrow that way I'm not led astray by the smell of the deep fryer
SM: It will take soooo long to make lunch and it will be so easy to just buy something, that next show on TV will be really good, I guess it's too hard really.

HM: Today is a new day, I'm going to look after myself and be happy.
SM: Who are you kidding, be happy? That's way too hard, besides there's left over cake in the fridge for breakfast.

You see the pattern? The thing is I've tried and tried to stop using the hardness factor as an excuse, I even wore an elastic band around my wrist and flicked it every time I said it was too hard, to try the pain with association thing, all I got out of that were welts. I mean, really, it's just too hard (ha!). So I've devised a new plan, based on absolutely no amount of research on any kind of psychological behavior modification techniques, just me, my brilliant brain and too much time on my hands. The Plan: remember something I've done that was actually hard and think of that when I start to chant my "it's too hard" mantra.

This is how it went......

HM: Wow, it's so warm let's pick The Ninja up from work and go for a swim at the beach.
SM: But it's too hard, I have to put my swimmers on and get in the car and drive there.
HM: That's not hard, working night shift for a year and studying full-time, that was hard, this is nothing.
SM: Oh yeah

HM: I've got all those veges in the fridge I'll make a stir fry for dinner and steam some fish just the way I like it.
SM: Awww but that's way too hard, I have to chop the veges and put them in the wok and peel the garlic and slice the ginger for the fish.
HM: That's not hard, diving into a freezing cold river in the middle of winter when all your instincts are telling you not to, that was hard, this is a piece of cake (wholemeal, fat and taste free of course!).
SM: Damn, you got me.

HM: I'm going to keep a food diary because I know it keeps me on track and it's a great way to assess what's really going on.
SM: That is way way too hard, I have to write down everything I eat everyday, there's no way I can keep that up, it's so hard I shouldn't even bother starting.
HM: No way, that's not hard, trekking across an island with an 17kg pack in the 38 degree heat, that was hard, this is, well, a piece of piss.
SM: Geez, I give up, but this isn't the last you'll hear of me *evil laugh*

Surprisingly simple yet powerfully effective, I really have no excuse now. Let's see how that goes.

"In the middle of difficulty lies opportunity"
Albert Einstein

By the way I lost 1.4kg this week :)

We'll start with the truth.....

2008-11-13T17:20:00.019+11:00

I'm just going to come out and say it, I want to be skinny. I don't mean knee knocking, bones poking through your skin supermodel skinny, I mean, I still eat sometimes skinny. I want to look like those girls who appear fabulous, effortless, gorgeous, you know the ones. Now don't think me a fool, I'm more than aware of the fact that your happiness isn't necessarily related to your dress size, but this whole blogging thing is an exercise in being honest, so let's get real here, most of us out there want to be thinner, me included.

After re-gaining a hard lost 20kgs, pushing my BMI well into the obese category and my self esteem into the underworld, I've decided it's time for a change. I had this crazy idea that if I studied nutrition I would get all the answers, lose weight and be happy *dah-dah*. Well I couldn't be further from the truth. Geez folks who wouldda thought?! You have to get up off your hail damaged arse and actually DO something before the fat-free fairy comes along and magics away your self-loathing and rather large thighs.

So here I am, armed with some knowledge and 20 years of fat thinking and living. My goal? To lose about 40kgs and re-gain nothing more than my self-esteem and a sense that I am much more than that number on the scales.

"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step"

Lao-Tzu, Chinese Taoist Philosopher .